seannyy

hash tag hair stories

2012-02-10T00:40:00.001+11:00

I know, I'm being very not good at the blogging thing this year. So here are my tweets from my last proper post to this date, just to keep you informed on what I've been up to.

Sean Michael, 5 February
so bored.

Sean Michael, 5 February
There's nothing better than pie flavoured yoghurt. Banana caramel pie that is!

Sean Michael, 5 February
I thought I had finished the yoghurt and I come back to find some left! #ilovepieyoghurt

Sean Michael, 5 February
I've always been intrigued by this yoghurt. Sure it's banana caramel flavoured. But it's also PIE flavoured too?! #ilovepieyoghurt

Sean Michael, 5 February
I haven't had banana caramel pie, but I've had banana caramel pie yoghurt?!?!? #ilovepieyoghurt

Sean Michael, 5 February
I've finished eating it now. #livetweeting #ilovepieyoghurt

Sean Michael, 5 February
Slowly trying to get this as a trending topic #ilovepieyoghurt

Sean Michael, 6 February
dyed my hair today. also washed it for the first time in weeks, probably. #hairstories

Hair!

Sean Michael, 6 February
my hair goes really fluffy when it's washed, so that's why I wash it rarely #hairstories

Sean Michael, 6 February
@AdamHillsIGST by the gods! have you not given Hannah a chair yet?!

Sean Michael, 6 February
I got a secret anon tumblr lover. Why someone like me only ever gets tumblr love and not tumblr hate, I'll never know. I'd tease me.

Sean Michael, 7 February
time to sleep? lolno. time to read #girlwiththedragontattoo

Sean Michael, 7 February
I know not what to tweet.

Sean Michael, 7 February
wertyuiopkjhgfe,57rde46rtuyouyfyufytfuo6redfghjk,mnbvcx.

Sean Michael, 7 February
i wish i had money because then i would buy things.

Sean Michael, 7 February
actually, brb, checking net banking, got paid today? #fingerscrossed

Sean Michael, 7 February
got paid! now i have money to buy things!

Sean Michael, 8 February
ohdeargodishouldsleep

Sean Michael, 8 February
I think I just acquired a headache from reading a facebook fight.

Sean Michael, 8 February
I'M GOING TO MELBOURNE IN NOVEMBER! THEN GOING TO BE OVERSEAS FOR 2013! #trips

Sean Michael, 9 February
fuck that shift. omg.

Sean Michael, 9 February
I think I will go to 'The Vault' tomorrow.

Sean Michael, 9 February
Hopefully it doesn't close again due to 'technical faults' before I get there.

Sean Michael, 9 February
Just making sure... by 'The Vault' i mean my sex dungeon.

So what have I been up to?

Yeah. Nothing much.

midnight ponderings

2012-02-10T00:16:00.004+11:00

I should never stay up any time past midnight, because it makes me depressed. I have no idea why, but as it always happens, the time will clock over to twelve, and it’s like I see everything clearer or something. It's like I have been living blissfully ignorant during the day and it's only at night that I sit down and look at my whole life laid out in front of me.

I start regretting choices I've made. I start disliking most things about myself. I start hating that I dislike things about myself. I start fearing the future. And then I torture myself by staying up for another hour or so, watching shows online and whatnot as if I'm trying to block out the negative thoughts even though they are all still at the back of my head.

Then I go to bed and then I wake up the next morning and think ‘Why the hell did I think that? LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL!’ and I break out into song and dance and then I have breakfast.

nothing to everything

2012-02-05T16:19:00.000+11:00

On the 31st of January I spent the morning hurriedly finishing off the cover to a sketchbook I had been working on since November, for what is known as The Sketchbook Project. This project basically involves thousands of artists getting a blank sketchbook with a certain theme, and doing whatever they want with it. Then they all are put in a collection and sent on a tour around the world.

The theme I chose was 'Nothing New' and my aim was to ensure that my theme emphasised the complete opposite, so it starts with 'nothing' and ends with 'everything', as so many new experiences have occurred for me since last year.

Now I would never consider myself an artist, and some of the pages in my book didn't turn out exactly as envisioned, however I'm happy with what I've done. And now here I am sharing it with you, page by page!

If you want to see the book IRL, or want to see the many thousands of other (most probably better) sketchbooks, then check the site and see when the tour is near you. I'll be going down to Melbourne in November to go see them all myself hopefully!

it's nice to be alive

2012-02-04T17:02:00.001+11:00

It's good to have lazy days like this one. I haven't had many in a while. Life has been radically different for me recently. And I'm not sure if it's in a good way or a bad way.

Life used to be nice. I would wake up, go to school, see the same faces everyday, come home, sit around, go online, then eventually get around to school work, go to bed. Then the cycle would repeat. Despite my complaints about it all the time last year, I liked that. It made sense to me.

Now I'm in disarray. I have a job. I have been trying and failing to work out university stuff in my head. I've been out a few times to socialise with people, but without seeing people I would have regularly seen at school, I feel like they are slipping away. But even saying that, my lack of time to go out places is a factor in why I haven't seen them.

It's a weird life I'm living currently. So this is one of the few lazy days I've had this year. I've woken up really late, have been blasting my music and pretty much sitting around. I had breakfast at 1pm. I have things I should probably do, but I'm leaving them till later.

See! I miss these lazy days! I'm sort of enjoying not giving a shit about anything right now. It's nice. It won't last forever though, sadly. But I'll just soak it all in at the moment.

Also, these are the songs I have on repeat currently:

Brother - Matt Corby
It's Nice to be Alive - Ball Park Music
Naked Kids - Grouplove
If You Wanna - The Vaccines
Awkward - San Cisco
Zoom - Last Dinosaurs
Ghost - Bombay Bicycle Club
Money - The Drums
I Feel Better - Gotye
Restless - Kakkmaddafakka

I'm seriously in love with the music I own at the moment. I keep getting up to go do something productive, but then hearing another song I like and thinking, I might just sit here online a little longer.

End post.

welcome to hipster central

2012-02-04T16:29:00.001+11:00

The other day I had my university enrolment. Let me tell you about it.

It was an extremely long and exhausting day. In order to get to Wollongong for my enrolment, I had to catch a bus. Only I had to get the train to get to where the bus was. And it was the only bus I could get for the whole day. So it was vital I didn't miss it.

I got down to the train station and saw a train go past at 10.20, and assumed this was an earlier train. However, when I bought my ticket and sat down, and the 10.24 train had not arrived, I started freaking out that it had been the earlier train and I had missed it. The board said that the next train I could get would only arrive at the station 5 minutes after the bus would leave.

I was having a mini heart attack just thinking that I was going to completely miss the bus. Turns out my original train was actually just 10 minutes late. Although late, this train was going to arrive at the other station earlier than what train I thought I was now going to have to catch.

I arrived at the other station with 2 minutes to get onto the bus. Talk about cutting it fine. However, I got the train and all was fine with the world. I met Samantha at another bus stop, and then we talked the whole way to Wollongong in the rain and fog, only having our bus nearly hit another car once, and also going down Bulli Pass when visibility was low.

We got into the uni eventually, and both went and started choosing our subjects on our own separate ways. I found it very confusing, especially when the people there to help me kept contradicting one another. However, I filled out the form for subjects.

Then I had to get my ID photo taken. Then I had to fill out everything from the subject form onto the computer as well as other details. This left me ringing Dad several times to ask him what the number and address of my Aunt's house was, since I had to write this down as my new address.

That was a weird moment. It still hasn't completely hit me that I'm moving down there part time.

Then there was some information session on the network they use at the university, which I just stopped halfway through writing this to look at. And now I have a practice timetable set up! So hopefully I'll be able to achieve something that looks like this, for my convenience.

So the day was pretty tiring and tedious. Especially with public transport. Thankfully Sam gave me a lift home, saving me having to catch another train.

But the university is looking exciting and promising and amazing and all other good words. For every moment I'm not in a lecture or tutorial, I know I'll be chilling in one of a hundred cool places that exist in this university. There's a room with beanbags. Need I say more? Like, seriously.

So I'm looking forward to it. It's just damn confusing!

Blog title inspired by Ruby Bisson.

back to school

2012-01-30T14:58:00.000+11:00

So here I am sitting on a train going to see a design client in the city. Except it's really hot. So hot that I can feel every internal organ melting inside me. I had to run to the station too. And in chinos. And now my ankle hurts. I'm really not in a good way.

But what's different about today? Well, it's the first day back at school today. And I'm not there.

It is quite strange to think that another school year has begun, but instead it lacks my friends and I. It feels harsh in one way, as if we've been forgotten, cast aside. And yet it feels great in another way, as if we're free, and we're able to go off in our own separate ways.

What is really weird for me is the fact that, despite writing all of that in the style of a Bold and the Beautiful script, I don't feel like I should be going back. I don't feel as if I'm missing out.

Which is good, I guess, but I know that only means it hasn't hit me yet. Just wait till I get home and K is talking about all the lectures they would have gotten about this being their last year; about the principal's extra-long speech; how the bells didn't work; how their timetables were given out; how something funny happened in period 5.

And then I'll miss it. I will. But for now I'm preoccupied with work, and university enrolments and the prospect of another month to sort things out before I move down to Wollongong.

It does feel as if I'm living in a completely different world, with a complete change of scenery. There are all new faces and places in my life, and I haven't even started uni yet!

Everything's changing, but that's good. I like that. I know I'd feel comfortable with going back to school. But change is important and especially exciting.

My trains coming into Town Hall. My legs are not enjoying their forced trip to the sauna, and my tshirt has collapsed due to heat exhaustion. The train also keeps on stopping in the middle of this tunnel. I'm going to miss my next train now. Fun fun. Looks like a good time to end this post.

loudspeaker

2012-01-29T14:25:00.000+11:00

Before I even start explaining this complex story, I must point out that I know nothing about mobile phones. Which seems to shock everyone. People are continually getting frustrated with me because they think I'm asking stupid questions about phones that everyone knows the answers to.

Everyone assumes that since I know how to use a computer, a video camera and a microwave, I automatically know how to change my mobile from one phone plan to another. And while they are getting frustrated with me, I am getting frustrated with them because I genuinely have no idea about phones. No idea.

I have never had to set up a phone for myself before, and I've always had the same phone plan for years. So how would I know how to change over numbers and unblock SIMS and get PUK codes and activate things?! Apparently this knowledge comes naturally to everyone else.

I had one of the worst phone plans in the history of phone plans. I was with a certain phone company that I now despise. In order to keep them anonymous, I will name them Op-Tus for the purpose of this story.

With Op-Tus I was supposed to get all these bonuses with this plan thing. I paid $30 a month and apparently would get $300 credit with that to use. But this never worked! And it frustrated me that there were so many better phone plans out there!

So I decided that I would change my phone plan. No task has ever been more difficult. I'd prefer to have taken the ring to Mount Doom. Twice over. Anything and everything is easier than this.

One day, I approached another phone company which, for the purpose of this story, is named Vodaf One. They told me I would have to unlock or unblock this thing on my phone. And that I had to get Op-Tus to do it before I could change plans.

So I went to the Op-Tus store, where the lady there said I had to do it over the phone. And so I went on the phone there, and the machine-voice took me around in circles for half an hour until I got frustrated and left the store.

Because I thought I'd be able to change my phone plan that day, I had let my Op-Tus credit run out. I put $10 onto my credit so I would have some before I went and got the plan changed over properly.

As I recharged this credit, Op-Tus told me that they had a new offer, where I could get 70 free texts for the month. My first thoughts were 'Wow, the day I decide to change my phone plan, and now they're giving me offers?!'

However, these thoughts soon changed when – surprise, surprise – as soon as I ran out of my $10 credit, the 70 free texts did not exist. Another bonus that didn't work?! No way!

I was not only more frustrated at Op-Tus now, but frustrated that I still didn't know exactly how to change to Vodaf One because it all seemed to damn complicated.

However, Kieran had recently changed to another phone company, which I will name Virg Inn, so I figured if he had done so, then I could easily get him to help me change over to this. I went into the Virg Inn store, and the lady there didn't say anything about having to unblock Op-Tus, so she just changed my plan over, gave me a temporary number that I would need for up to 3 days, and gave me a new SIM thing.

What confused me this time was that my old number began working immediately, and the temporary number was not needed. Then my phone was able to text people. But then it 'ran out of credit' even though I was just given a new set of credit. But then it was letting me text some people, until I realised it was because it was free Virg Inn to Virg Inn phones.

And then all this other confusing stuff happened. But the important part is that I now have a phone with a proper plan on it. I pay $19, I get $50 credit and 500mb of internet downloads.

All is right with the world.

future woes

2012-01-25T00:04:00.003+11:00

We all recieved our university offers the other day and I'm feeling very overwhelmed with it all now. It hadn't occurred to me how confusing this could all be, until I realised there were enrolment days and pre-enrolment days and programs and forms and timetables and subjects and majors and minors and credits and ... just what?!

I'm reassuring myself that I'm one of many who have no idea how any of this works, but I hate this feeling. When I can't understand something that I need to know, I will fuss over it. I need to have preparation before I do something or I will stress.

So being thrown in the deep end as such hasn't helped me. Also what hasn't helped, is having lots of other friends already enrolling and getting ID cards at their universities, and I feel like I'm missing out, even though my university hasn't done any of that yet. Well, I hope.

But I also think part of this concern is similar to that same feeling I got back on the first day of Year 7, when I realised that now I was in a new place and there were few people I knew and I would have to work everything out from square one.

Surely I would be able to relax knowing that even though everything seems very complex now, I will know how it all works in the end – as I have seen from starting as this confused Year 7 student and finishing my high school career knowing the ins and outs of the school.

But I can't relax, dammit. I dislike not knowing things! I dislike the confusion of it all.

And I don't like the idea of not seeing lots of my friends everyday. That's going to suck a lot. And sadly lots of us will drift apart. Which already sucks. But it's a new step in life, and I know it will be exciting, and radically different, and important, and I know I'm going to love uni life.

Just need to get over my nerves first.

February 1. Enrolment Day. I'm looking forward to finding some uni person and being like 'I don't know what's going on please help me oh my lord this is so confusing' and having them explain it all and it'll all work out and be lovely.

Apologies if this isn't spelt or written correctly, even though it's only just past midnight, I am so very tired that even the prospect of having work at midday tomorrow seems grim.

Goodnight everyone. Congratulations to all those who got into the unis / colleges / courses they wanted to get into. I'm glad to be sharing all my same frustrations and excitement with you all.

first steps

2012-01-23T14:13:00.000+11:00

Yes, okay, okay, I haven't been as busy a blogger as I normally am. But there just isn't that much to talk about in my life at the moment. What I do at the moment is go to work, eat, sleep, socialise. Which could be enjoyable for me to recount, but also very tedious and pointless. I don't need to document everything I do down to the minutest details, after all.

However, one important thing that happened the other day was that of me changing rooms with my brother. So it may not seem that important to anyone else, but for me it is seeing as I have always lived in that room. And by always, I mean always. Otherwise why would I have said? Jeez.

I have been in that bedroom since I was a baby. The walls used to be yellow, then I painted them green, then I painted them blue and beige. The bedroom has evolved as I have grown. I also always had the biggest bedroom of the house.

But since I'll be moving to Wollongong and living down there most of my time (or only some, depending on my university timetable) K and I thought that Kieran having the bigger room would be better for him. Since he has all his guitars and stuff.

However, the Swapping of the Rooms was quite an event, for which K and I had not planned for. While the parents were away in Adelaide celebrating their 20th Anniversary, we attempted this task.

Kieran refusing to get out of bed in the morning led us to starting the swap at 2, even though Kieran had friends arranged to come over at 6. We thought this would be fine. Apparently not.

Kieran got all the stuff out of his room and dumped it in the living area in a great big horrible mess. My move was easier than his, as I transferred everything from my room to his, and I had less stuff already since I had cleaned up my room a week earlier.

So my room was pretty simple. And now its set up great. I even managed to make it more spacious than K ever was able to, so happy with that. However, Kieran's room is still in disarray. There is just stuff everywhere!

His friends started coming over at 6 when all his stuff was still in piles outside his new room, and he even had some of them helping him clean it! It was ridiculous. In the end, he just had to dump it all on the floor of his new room, and so Mum and him are currently trying to sort it out... a couple of days later.

It's amazing how much stuff was in his room. Really! I'm amazed. If you saw the mess, and then the size of his old bedroom, you'd wonder how it did all fit in there.

I'm just really sad now that I no longer have my bedroom. It was difficult to part from it. But now I'm good. I'm coping. It's still weird.

And today I'm having a great day. Newly downloaded music on, paints out, home made hamburgers, calm weather... it's going lovely!

cleaning up

2012-01-16T18:15:00.000+11:00

Do you know how long it takes to change, fix up and organise your online social networking accounts?

Does this even need to be answered? Yes.
Then why did I answer then? No idea.
Why am I answering my own questions? I don't know.
Now why am I asking a rhetorical question?
Why do you think this might be an open-ended question?
What if this was a hypothetical question?
[And, while I'm thinking about it, is this a parenthetical question?]

It has taken me bloody two days. Two full days to get everything kind of sorted and cleaned up. When something needs to be cleaned, I will generally procrastinate over it. But when I finally get to cleaning it, I go all obsessive compulsive on that crap.

K and I are swapping rooms soon, since I'll be living partly in Wollongong in the next month or so. We figured he would get more use out of having the bigger bedroom with all his musical instruments and the like, and I can put up with staying in the smaller room when I am actually staying here.

The computer screen shows the blog that you are reading now. BLOGCEPTION!

So I have been trying to organise all the stuff in my room. Currently there is a big pile of stuff I want to keep on the floor, in the way of my computer. I'm like clambering over it just to try and type this, so appreciate the quality and length of this post.

It has also been determined that I own too many books, seeing as all the books I want to keep take up four shelves in my room, and Kieran gets one for himself.

However, in order to clean my room, it has taken me a great amount of time and now I am finally nearing completion and I guess everything will get properly sorted once I put it into my 'new' room.

Nevertheless, this cleaning up task is much more pleasant than the 'cleaning up' task I have done on the internet. I decided that since I wanted my new Youtube account attached to my blog, that I would change the email over on the blog.

Which was quite difficult. Then I decided to move Tumblr and Twitter and all that over to this new email also. But I decided to delete my Twitter first, because then I would be able to make a new one that would be fresh. But apparently making a new Twitter account is quite difficult too.

Don't get me started on the crappy privacy settings on Facebook!

So now Facebook is the only one on the old email, which I can't delete anyway because there are too many important emails I have received over time which I may need to refer to later.

So now I have most accounts on the new email, Facebook on the old one, and my other email address, my business one, is separate all together. But in order to have access to all three email addresses all at the same time, and since Gmail doesn't allow you to have all three Gmails open at the same time, I am now using three different internet browsers just to have everything available.

I don't think I've articulated this all very clearly. But I felt the need to express my frustrations. Just angrily shake your fist at the screen for me in sympathy, will you?

Bully Boy is angry at how difficult it was. Thank you for your empathy, Bully Boy.

After all this endless effort, I am finally kind of satisfied. I've also made the themes for my Blogger, Youtube and Twitter all similar. Cheers to me for being a complete branding twat!

making headlines

2012-01-13T11:54:00.001+11:00

So I started my new job on Wednesday, which was quite an experience for me, seeing as I haven't had a proper job before. And it was actually pretty easy, and I actually enjoyed it, which is what surprised me the most.

I was brilliant at putting the burgers together and I found myself constantly watching to see if there was anything else to do, which is what you're supposed to do, but not what they expected out of a trainee on his first day.

It's nice and quite relieving to actually have somewhere I have to be at a certain time now, since I've spent the last two months as a lost soul wandering around and not knowing exactly what to do. Don't get me wrong, all this time to socialise is brilliant!

It's been so great that it's come to the point where I look back and question how the hell I ever did all that endless school work? Seems like an enormous task that I struggled through, and seems horrible when I look back, and look at how lazy I am now.

School was the place I had to be at certain times, so now work is the replacement. And this time I'm getting paid for it. So everyone wins really.

I did turn down a second job offer, but I felt really bad. It was quite a dramatic series of events that happened. I returned home from my shift, expecting to have to go out again in another hour to start at another job. I drove through some really thick smoke that was coming from a grass fire in some gully a couple of blocks away from my house.

Mum and Kieran decided they wanted to go look at the fire, so went off while I was left to call the manager of the other job.

I had weighed the pros and cons of this other job, and decided there was more cons than pros, so I called him up and turned down his offer, and he sounded really sad about it all. So after having this awkward conversation, I realised I was missing out on seeing a bush fire.

I ran and ran down the street to catch up with Mum and Kieran. Only, now I have learnt, that running into a fire is not the smartest idea. Trying to catch your breath after an intense run, only to find that there is no oxygen, only smoke, is quite bad.

I was breathing in so much smoke, and my throat was burning. It felt like I had swallowed dirt that had just been taken out of the oven (if anyone were ever to cook dirt).

We couldn't see much from where we were, so we walked home. Meanwhile, I was texting Morgan about the potential danger surrounding her Dad's house, and as I was walking away from the smoke back home, I kept receiving texts from her about how the police wouldn't let her in and such.

With only Facebook and rumours to keep us up-to-date, we discovered that the bush fire was turning into a major bush fire. Smoke was flooding our front yard and back yard, there was talk of people evacuating and not being let back to their houses.

There were rumours of two houses being on fire, as well as two cars, yet these were untrue in the end. But our town started appearing as top stories on news networks! We could hear helicopters hovering for hours on end. The smoke would fade away, then come back. There were more evacuations.

We were too far away for us to have to evacuate luckily. I was still suffering from smoke inhalation later that night, when our story had been pushed down to the second top story.

But yeah. It was intense! Meanwhile, most of my friends didn't even know about it at all. So. Yeah. That was my story about the bush fires no one knew about. Thank you.

plans into action

2012-01-10T22:20:00.000+11:00

So, I'm about to get very busy. More busy than I was previously. Previous busy was me socialising far too much with everyone, but now I have two jobs to go and start at. Both in fast food. Tomorrow I have to do a 'safety induction' in the morning, then go to my second job for a practical at 4 before I do the written exam for it next week.

Which also means I have to cancel a meeting with my design client which was planned for 5. See? Talk about busy. Of course this is a good thing though, as I have been lazing around far too much recently, and now I have things I have to get to and do.

And most importantly, I will be getting pay. Eventually.

The sad part about this all is that the nose piercing is gone. Goneskies. Which is a modern term used by mentally challenged people. But yes, I had to take it out. It hadn't healed fully yet, but I took it out, hoping I could put in the thinner ring Jess gave me, but the hole closed up within 2 seconds and I couldn't find it.

So I'm just going to have to let this piercing heal up. Many will be relieved it no longer exists. I am a bit, as it's great to not have something attached to your nose. On the other hand, I'm quite sad it's gone. I think it looked good and I wanted to wait to see it look all healed up and lovely.

But these things are an inconvenience, especially for me. Couldn't handle it. Now I couldn't wear it anyway. It's for the best, I say with a tear in my eye and a dramatic turn into the distance.

Oh well. There are plenty more chances to get piercings. Or tattoos. Maybe tattoos can be the next thing. Hmmm.

Recently I had a party at mine that was sort of like the Post-Christmas parties that had apparently become a tradition, only this time it was a Post-2011 kind of party. A Post-Christmas, Post-New Years, Post-2011 sort of party-like thing.

I also spent a night over at a friends with a group of people which was fun! But now my socialising will be reduced as I become a worker. Kind of sad, but also I will be glad to have something that I have to go to, since school no longer exists.

On the same note, watch my Youtube video above. This is my new thing. I'm planning on making a video in a similar format, or completely different, each week. One a week! Let's see if I can do it!

And that is that update over.

a little vague

2012-01-07T18:54:00.002+11:00

I haven't even been keeping people updated on what I've been doing! Sorry about that. It's just that I've been, you know, just doing stuff. Just things and stuff. Just been chilling with people and doing things and I haven't had time to blog about it, or I haven't felt the need to. But I'm going to clear this up now.

Last Wednesday I went to this place with a group of people. It was pretty fun, although two of the people got lost somewhere but eventually found themselves back where we were, but it took them like ages. We even couldn't buy stuff because there was something wrong and shit. But it was fun!

Then on Thursday I went with a friend to some thing in this place. We got there super earlier, but we just chatted about things and stuff forever and it was kind of nice to just chill and converse. We later found thingy's boyfriend and hang out at this place near this other place I already knew and then eventually we went into the place we were supposed to be going, super late, and it was actually worthwhile to go see the thing we went to see!

Last night I went to this other place too with two other people previously not hung out with the other two days. And we just went and drank things and it was pretty chill and we had conversations about stuff and it was, in general, pretty good. We ended up at another place where we ate, then ended up outside my place and it was great.

Tonight I have something else on and it will be fun and stuff. So for the entirety of this last week, overall it has been good. Yeah.

new year cheer

2012-01-01T17:42:00.000+11:00

Kenney: Aaaaaand now it's 2012.
Sean: I love 2012!
Kenney: Yeah, it's real pretty.
Sean: 2012 is sooooooo pretty!

Yes, yes, selfies! Okay? I just needed something to complete this photo-lacking post.

How about that huh? All we had to do was countdown at 11:59:50 and then all of sudden it was a different year. That was a decent effort from you all, well done.

I spent my evening in the lovely company of Lauren, Josh, Jake, Morgan, Sarah, Marnie, Jake, Billy, Matt and Alex as we chilled at Lauren's. At the time it seemed like the most fun, but upon waking this morning, my headache was telling me that the most fun can come with consequences.

So now it is 2012, I think I should probably highlight some New Year's resolutions as seems to be the tradition to do so. Of course, I think resolutions are mostly silly anyhow as I never seem to be able to achieve all of them, but they are a nice sentiment, to create hopes and wishes for the future.

Last year my New Year's resolutions were the following:
- Get a job
- Get my P's
- Get a great ATAR
- Get into the uni course I want
- Become more confident
- Make more friends
- Be a happier person, not a bastard

Job? Surprisingly achieved. In fact, I have to ring them shortly to tell them to give me shifts as they haven't as of yet. Their excuse was that they had to get me pants, and I'm pretty sure that task has been achieved and I will be able to begin my fast food career. Haha.

P's? Err. Well. No. That didn't happen. Dammit.

Great ATAR? Well, I got what I needed and it was pretty great. So yes. Achieved!

Uni course? Well, I don't even know yet. Clearly I had no idea how the UAC system worked last year. However, I did get Early Entry into the course I wanted to do, so, yes, achieved also.

Confidence? Not to the extent I wish I had, but it's a slow process but I am getting better. I have made more friends too! In fact, I think I've made quite a lot. I spent my New Year's Eve with guys I didn't even know properly in school and now I am good friends with. I also have 'drinking buddies' too now.

Being a happier person? Well, in terms of talking with people and stuff, I don't think I was as much of a bastard as I usually am. My parents, of course, would disagree. I think I was not that happy though, but this was all because of school stress. Eh.

So, my New New Year's resolutions will be:
- Get my P's
- Become even more confident
- Make more friends
- Be a happier person, not a bastard
- Get involved in everything at uni!

And I think that will do. I'm no good at this resolutions thing anyhow. Might as well recycle some from last year, to see if I can actually tick them off my list finally. But one thing I must do is get involved at uni. I just need to do everything possible. I'm getting the most out of my year, that's for sure.

Despite the heat, I have to take the dog for a walk now. So I will leave this here. Happy 2012 all! May this year bring you great things and stuff! Hooray!

endings and beginnings

2011-12-31T16:11:00.000+11:00

Once more, I have completed another year on my Photo A Day project, hoping to continue for as long as possible! I think that by now, I can safely say I do actually look older than I did two years ago. So that's that! 2011 on my blog is complete!

Before we all go out to party tonight, can I just get all the stupid, lame jokes everyone will do tonight and tomorrow out of the way now? Please, no one, feel the need to, under any circumstances, leading up to the New Year say:

I won't be home till next year.
I'm partying all the way into next year.
The next time I shower will be next year.

"If I hear "see you next year" again (really I get it), I'm grabbing a shovel, putting on a Bane mask-breather-thing and heading out on a rampage" – Joel McHale, via Twitter

Or, upon the arrival of the New Year, say:

I haven't had a shower since last year.
I haven't been to the toilet since last year.
I haven't slept since last year.
I haven't eaten since last year.

These, and any other derivatives, should be refrained from at all times. I've let them out of my system as a way of letting them out of yours, and I do not want to hear them. Because they were funny the first time, but now they have become lame and repetitive.

Glad that's cleared up. But I'm not just going to end my blog's year with that, because that would be no fun at all. We need to end this on a positive note!

I'd just like to say THANK YOU! to whoever reads this, for taking an interest in me, my life and my opinions and I hope you continue to read whatever appears on here in the future. It has certainly become a hobby of mine to just constantly record bits and pieces of my life, and I'm glad there are people who are reading it and making it even more worthwhile.

Have a lovely New Years Eve everyone, party hard but not so hard that they'll have to produce a Hangover 3, and I'll talk to you all next year!

Argh, dammit, fell into my own trap.

Seán.

recollections of a year

2011-12-31T13:06:00.000+11:00

So we have come to the end of another year. Another year! It really does astound me how time quickly passes. Well, everyone always says this. During the year, everything seems to take forever. Especially this year for me, with the added pressure of important high school exams. But now at the end of it all, it seems as those time has just flown past!

Despite feeling like I didn't do much this year, due to the HSC, I did surprisingly alot! In fact, this year has been one of the most eventful I've ever had! This year, in no particular order, I...

- went to a functional mental hospital with Amie and Wise Ellis... slightly freaky
- went on a coffee crawl with Kenney, and experienced the results of the buzz!
- got one of the best haircuts this year, and it was done by Angus! It was my Angus Cut
- made a school-wide animation called Shying Away helped me get a 97/100!
- didn't get much sleep as a result of making this school-wide animation
- was frequently bipolar over everything, probably also because of school
- went on two cruises within a week of each other! And they were both lovely!
- stayed in a penthouse apartment for an evening with friends, which was very exciting
- wrote a stageplay entitled 'As Long As Its Natural' or 'The Pretty House' with Kenney
- performed it too! And it went really well!
- met the Governor of NSW along with Jen, Aneesa and Jordan
- met Voldemort with Jen too. I'd correct myself, but I don't actually know his proper name
- saw Dylan Moran in the city with Morgan
- saw The Wombats perform in Newtown, also with Morgan. That shit went off!!
- saw Maroon 5 with Aneesa! This also went off!!
- saw Mary Poppins with Jen, Robert and Morgan – it was supercalifragilistically awesome
- saw Seussical. The Meussical. With Angus and Casey. Kenney as Horton the Elephant!
- saw the pilot to The Unbelievable Truth and met Graeme Garden and Chaser Team
- experienced the ending of an 18th birthday party with the disappearance of a muppet
- painted a mural for the school with a group of friends, depicting 'Mona Hitler'
- watched Hamlet with my English class in a seedy suburb, with the 'Friday' song included in it!
- defeated a cold three times! Only THREE!
- saw a creepy and highly-religious lady on the train, constantly praying for an hour
- was abused, along with my friends, by a skinny tattoed guy at TAFE
- got abused by a dwarf on the way to the train station! It's okay though, I out-walked him
- celebrated 10 years since my European holiday!
- went around to different primary schools with Jen as School Captains and promoted the school
- ran the Swimming Carnival BBQ with a big group of people – my main job being advertising
- started a band, called Hey Frisco and started writing original songs, including a music video for one
- got in a talent show with said band! But lost in the second round. Nathan 'Bastard' Foley.
- completed the HSC, and successfully at that with an ATAR of 87.75
- found Spooner Street with Louise! Spooner Street. Best. Street. Ever.
- got a nose piercing to rebel against my parents, which worked effectively
- was a major extra in a film shoot, along with Aneesa! Hells yeah!
- did paid photography and film work for the school, capturing their Year 10 formal
- made a Year 12 Graduation video with Jess – the best video the school has ever experienced
- attended a copious amount of parties
- I turned 18! EIGHTEEN! Bitches love legal.
- got drunk for the first time, with the help of Dean and the straight vodka
- went clubbing for the first time at Hot Damn, which was quite an experience
- got my first fine, on a train, for feet on seat and having the wrong ticket
- was 'Santa' for the first time ever, and enjoyed being Santa far too much
- had my very first interview for a job, and now I have a job at KFC! Soon...
- had my very first interview for university, which went really well!
- made lots of new friends, especially my new 'drinking buddies' Daniel and Isabella

And I'm sure tonnes more happened with tonnes more people, but this is what came to me off the top of my head. Which is already quite a lot!

Despite the pain of school this year – when everything felt hopeless and the end felt too far away – I wouldn't change anything about 2011. At the end of it all, I am content with my year. Thankful for it.

So, I welcome 2012! Bring on another year! Another, especially different year, where I will experience a whole new life in university and beyond.

about things and stuff

2011-12-30T21:01:00.002+11:00

This is slightly random, but I felt like I was seriously lacking in an update that doesn't have much direction but also gives insight into stuff I generally don't talk about. Here are some new items I have acquired! Let's get our good old materialistic values on!

Vans. I've never had Vans ever. And now I do. For the bargain price of $40! That's what you get with some lucky shopping in Newtown. It was also convenient that the sales table they were on, all of the shoes available were my size. What a shoe-win!

Daria. This was one of my Christmas presents. I've only watched a couple of episodes so far, but it is even funnier now than when I used to watch it, mainly because now I get all the humour. And now I also agree with it too. The box set came with a Limited Edition tshirt. Sadly, it was a Ladies Medium.

Poster. This was a Christmas Present from Jen, a lovely arty poster from Doctor Who. Woo! I love it. And I just happened to be installing a Big Wall Of Stuff at the time, so now it's joined the Wall! Oh hello there, Mr Buble, didn't see you there. I got Buble here for FREE in Newtown. I don't know why it's so damn funny to own a Michael Buble poster, but it is.

Hair straightener. Oh, because this is emphasising my manliness even further. This was another Christmas present, but it is desperately needed for when my hair gets long again. It goes up to 230 degrees or something, which seems extremely hot to me.

Table. Yes, I get home from the shops today to find a new table and chairs all set up outside. There is mother, reading and looking concerned at my excitement to photograph outdoor furniture.

Beer?! I had to post this, even just to note down my favourite alcoholic beverage at this time. No, it's not beer. It's cider! Swedish cider! The best kind of drink ever in the world and I need to emphasise how amazing it is. This particular flavour, in fact, is so popular that it was the last one available. No idea how to pronounce the name of it though.

Camera. So this isn't a new item as such, but with a little inspiration from the other day, I decided to get it out. It's a camera that my grandma owned. I once took photos on it, and then the film failed and so I assumed it was the camera not working.

I only realised recently that back when I did this, it was when I was developing the photos myself and the teacher I had at the time I did this was giving me the wrong chemicals to develop it. So I'm hoping it was a chemical fault, and this time I take photos on it, they will come out when I go get them developed professionally.

It doesn't even have a view-finder, just a range-finder so I can't see exactly what I'm photographing. But I'm excited to use it for New Year's Eve and hopefully develop some awesome looking photos!

End post.

christmas and cream cheese

2011-12-28T13:25:00.000+11:00

Way back when / back in the day / in the olden days / when I was a kid*, I blogged a recipe for Cheesecake which was quite successful. In fact, ever since then, I have used that blog post to cook the cheesecake.

However, more recently, I discovered a recipe on some Potentially Dodgy Website which seemed to be a little bit different. So I followed it and made a new cheesecake. Turns out the Potentially Dodgy Website was not, after all, dodgy as I had created a cheesecake better than any other cheesecake I had ever baked. This New Improved Cheesecake was far superior.

I made this New Improved Cheesecake for the third time on Christmas Eve, and now I have actually perfected it perfectly to perfection. So much so, the over-use of the adjective 'perfect' was absolutely necessary there.

Here for you all, is the New Improved Cheesecake Recipe. I have changed things about it a little, so this is what I am currently making. Isn't that nice, a nice little updated recipe for you all?

WHAT YOU WILL NEED
• 250g plain sweet biscuits (like Milk Coffee)
• 125g melted butter
• 750g cream cheese
• 1 cup castor sugar
• Vanilla essence
• 2 teaspoons grated lemon rind
• 2 tablespoons plain flour
• 4 eggs
• 300 ml sour cream

STEP ONE crumby
To make the crumb base to the cheesecake, you need to get the 250g of plain biscuits and use a food processor to crush it all up finely. I used to make it into crumbs by hand, but now I have become lazy and use the tools available to me!

Add to the crumbs the melted butter and mix until its well combined. Even if it still quite loose, don't worry about it as it will stick to the base properly and no more butter is required! So, now get your spring-form pan and pour the crumbs in. Hands work best to press the crumbs along the base of the pan and the sides. There will be enough for a thin coverage, which is all you need. Place this in the fridge!

STEP TWO creamy
Preheating your oven to 160°C now would be a great idea! Now for the cream cheese mixture. Beat the cream cheese, sugar, vanilla and finely grated lemon rind with an electric mixer. You may need to heat the cream cheese up to soften it first, or mix it by hand a little just so it doesn't clog up your mixer.

Now for the New Improvements to this recipe, which includes beating in the flour. Add the eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition. The last ingredient is the sour cream, which you mix until just combined.

STEP THREE cheesy
Now pour this mixture into the prepared pan with the crumbs all nice and good in it. Put the cheesecake into the oven for 1 hour and 15 minutes or until its just set in the centre, which you can find out with a skewer.

Now, in order to prevent the cheesecake cracking, turn the oven off but leave the cheesecake in the oven to cool for about 2 hours. After this, leave it out to cool, then transfer to the fridge for further cooling! Add berries or anything for presentation and then it's done.

The only thing about this recipe is, because it's from that Potentially Dodgy Website, it's not actually a Donna Hay recipe. I feel like I've betrayed her. I feel like I've blasphemed. I'm so sorry Donna Hay. I still love you, it's just that this recipe was so good and...

I know it's not an excuse. Please forgive me! Donna! Please!

Donna? Donna? Ms Hay? Are you there?

Oh.

I'm so sorry!

*Yes, I can say this, because now I'm an adult!

merry sentiments

2011-12-26T19:09:00.000+11:00

I occasionally look back at old posts I've written on this strange blog of mine, to see all the weird and wonderful comments I had to make back then on different topics and such. So, of course, I looked back at the last two years' Christmas celebrations and both times I said I could no longer feel the Christmas spirit, the excitement and joy I normally would get out of this time.

This year however has been an eye opener. I did start with my usual belief that it would just be the same. And it was to begin with. It became this endless chore of going around buying presents, stressing over organising to see the family, and all the usual chaos that comes with this time of the year.

I think that I used to get preoccupied with thinking that I couldn't enjoy Christmas because it had become so commercialised that I developed a dislike for it. I felt that after all the materialistic values of the season, the true meaning had been lost.

But, yet again this year, I did what everyone did. I went shopping. Alot. Spent time stressing over present. Spending far too much money. And you know, I may still dislike the idea this, but it is something that has just been done.

And, for me, the true meaning of Christmas had sort of become blurred. I'm not religious, and I wasn't celebrating this season for the sake of any religious meaning, so in addition to the commercialism, I found myself lost in this season, not being able to enjoy it.

The last two years I had nothing to attach myself to at this time. I was too busy trying to have a moral high-ground by disliking the present thing and not immersing myself in the religious aspect.

But then Christmas time came again this year. And I wasn't feeling detached like I have the last two years. I got into the spirit. The Kruyer's came over for Christmas Eve. Sure we did the present thing, but it just became that it was the thought of the present rather than the present that I enjoyed most.

It was the company we had that night which made it worthwhile. The same applied for Christmas the next day. I had taken on the role of Santa because I thought it would be fun. And it was! Wrapped up some presents, put them out at night, Dad woke the next morning to see presents from Santa!

It was his enjoyment at finding this, and knowing he wasn't Santa this time like he would have years ago, that made it all the more worthwhile. It was like keeping a silly tradition going that made it all the more fun.

We went to Mum's side of the family for lunch. Yet again, it was the company. The presents became this game sort of like Secret Santa, where one person opens a present and then the next person in line can either to choose to pick a new present, or steal the other person's if they like it. This turned into a fight between Kieran and Breanna as they both wanted the portable fan!

Today, Boxing Day, was Dad's side. Again, we just had great fun catching up in the usual O'Gorman fashion of talking over each other very loudly yet keeping up with every conversation.

I realised that after all the shopping and the presents and stress, Christmas just became a gathering with friends and family at the end of another year, to celebrate the year, to celebrate love and family.

Christmas is now, to me, a time for love. It is a day where you know everyone who is driving along the motorway with you is off to see family for the same reasons, off to have fun in each other's company and the fact that everyone around you is celebrating in this restful time just gives me a good feeling.

I know I'm being soppy and all, but I really enjoyed this Christmas. I love my family and my friends and I just had great fun being in their company and forgetting all my silly thoughts about the last couple of Christmas days. I've found my own meaning to this season, and it made it all the more fantastic!

Merry Christmas all!

shake up christmas

2011-12-26T19:08:00.001+11:00

What did I get up to this Christmas? Allow me to show you in a series of photos.

The family stood around the Christmas tree. Just casually.

The Kruyer's came over for Christmas Eve!

Aneesa and I spent alot of time taking photos of ourselves, because this is what we do.

Aneesa got smashed! She was well wasted!

Kieran and Zain spent alot of 'alone time' together this night.

No idea what they were up to.

The next day, Santa came with presents for everyone!

Even Katie, who got Schmackos!

Mother and I had an enjoyable Christmas morning.

We went to the Miller's for lunch.

Turned out Lachlan and I did actually have Coke bottles of our names!

The day was quite enjoyable!

But trying to take a photo of these three proved to be a difficult task.

Boxing Day was Dad's side of the family.

This is Andrew giving me his usual love and affection.

Christmas had been a successful and lovely time of the year!

But for some, it was quite tiring.

So there you go, Christmas condensed into ten photos. Merry Christmas everyone! Hope you had an enjoyable festive season and had as much as I did!

extra, extra!

2011-12-22T14:46:00.000+11:00

I've been quite popular in the newspaper this week! I've never had so many mentions, to the point where I am practically famous now. Yeah. I'm a household name. It's true. Shut up. Why are you doubting me? Actually, are you even doubting me? Because I can't really tell when I'm sitting here typing this and you are clearly reading this at a later time.

But shut up, it's my turn to sound pretentious!

Firstly, I was in the paper for our formal, which I was completely unaware of until someone mentioned it on Facebook. There I am! With Jen! Cutting a cake! Brilliant.

Then, I was in the paper amongst five hundred million other names of students in the Distinguished Honour Roll thing, or whatever it is named. Basically, it was a list of everyone who got at least one Band 6 in their exams.

Click for larger

And lastly, I was in this article about the Macarthur Playwriting Festival as Kenney and I were finalists with our play As Long as its Natural, or The Pretty House which we performed brilliantly on the night. Well I think so. We unfortunately did not win, but it was an... interesting night to say the least.

I like how the article also focuses on Kenney and I's play. Woo! See? Practically famous. If you want to see me, I'll be in my trailer. Bring me caviar.

this illusion

2011-12-20T16:03:00.000+11:00

A short story prepared for Extension English, that had to express the 'climate', feelings and sentiments of the Cold War era, which I have done through the writing of a fictional, kind of fantasy text.

This Illusion
by Seán O'Gorman

For all of his eighteen years, Fletcher Brown had never been up so early before in his life. He felt invigorated, although he was most certain he had not slept a single minute that night. The excitement had been overbearing. Yet finally, the Day had come! The Day! He could feel the vigorous rhythm of his pounding heart, pulsing through his entire body.

He opened his blinds carefully so as to not make any noise. Through the slits, his home town was revealed before him – a series of naturally formed skyscrapers made of sandstone, rising up past his window, into the clouds at a hundred thousand feet; and below, the empty, narrow streets that would soon be filled with markets and celebrations of the Day.

His mother had promised to iron his uniform when she awoke, so for a silent hour, Fletcher sat at his desk as the ominous blue glow of dawn soon turned to pinks and reds, colours of which imprinted themselves on his face as he stared down at the picture frame he held in his hand. A photo of his father in military attire.

John woke up screaming again that morning. He lived in the lower levels of Forrowmore, where it was more difficult to catch the sun and less difficult to catch your death. He grumbled to himself as he stepped out of his bed, passing the small framed mirror that reflected back all of his terrifying forty-nine years.

He went to open the food container, but then remembered how little rations he had left, so instead approached the narrow window. He stood staring at his hands until they reduced their trembling. Then he looked up where the menacing towers of stone stared down at him from within the dark.

The smell of toast made its way up through the passageways of the huddled housing units, probably the last of the flour for the week. He was just one of many people living like this, but no one seemed to care. From out of the small window, he reeled in his washing that was strung across a rope attached to a window on the building a metre opposite.

“Good morning John!” Markus appeared at this window as he took down the sheet covering it. “It’s the Day today! The Day! The wife and Gloria have been waiting in anticipation for weeks!”

“Ah, yes of course. You going down for the parade?”

“Absolutely! They said this day would come! We’ll be one step out of the dark.”

“Well, its not right for these boys to have to go and fight. What are they even fighting for?”

“The Beast, John, the Beast! It’s been in all the news reports! We have to go to war or else ...”

“And who’s telling you we have to?”

“We’ll be living like this for the rest of our lives if we don’t!”

John frowned at the man in the window. Markus gave a warm smile. “One step out of the dark, John. Just think of that!” And that’s exactly what John thought as Markus retreated from the window to prepare for the day’s celebrations. It was only a question of how long it would take before the dark caught up with them again.

Fletcher liked his short blonde hair. He also liked his freshly ironed trousers, his polished leather boots, his buttoned up shirt and his heavy jacket. Never had he worn such fine, expensive clothes! The sky was now painted a pale orange colour, indicating that it was time to leave.

His mother stepped up to the mirror where he was standing. “You look very handsome, Fletcher,” she said softly, “I’m so proud of you. And your father would have been too.” She smiled, yet there was sadness in her eyes. His father.

His father had gone to war himself, for several years. He did return, but for a single night. Fletcher winced just thinking of that night. It should have been a happier memory, his father’s safe return, but all he could remember were the horrified screams of the man who once read him bedtime stories. Ah, those stories of famous battles. He would lay in bed as a child as his father’s voice would send him into dreams of bravery and heroism, of the excitement that war could bring. He missed those bedtime stories.

So now, the Day had come. His dreams had become a reality. Even though he had been conscripted into the regiment, Fletcher would have volunteered anyway. As he finished his morning fruit, Fletcher tapped the breast pocket where he had concealed the image of his father. He wanted to go into battle for him. He was going to make him proud.

The marching drums. Left, right, left, right. The crowds. The banners. The size and atmosphere of the Sky Field overwhelmed Fletcher. As he marched in unison with his fellow comrades across the tarmac with the large sky vessels and the orange sky as a backdrop, Fletcher felt a sense of pride. He was helping his nation.

The angry cries of protest. Don’t let them go, don’t let them go. The crowding. The banners. The tragedy of the Day overwhelmed John. As he watched the boys all march like toy soldiers, all the same as the next, John felt like the protestors and himself were the only people on this Sky Field with common sense. He wanted to help his nation, but the nation thought they were helping themselves.

There was only 40 of them in his protest group – the rest of Forrowmore wanted the boys to fight. And why wouldn’t they, if it gave them a chance to be free from the dark? But it was just going to be another slaughter. These young, innocent boys would walk right off a cliff if the leaders told them to. Could no one else see who the real ‘Beast’ was here? John felt useless once again.

One step out of the dark.

Suddenly, John’s heart was pounding. It only took moments for panic to set it. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw his wife cheering in and waving at the military display. His eyes flicked over to the military display where he could see someone. Him! Someone so, so important.

His stomach sunk deeper than his jaw would allow his mouth to drop. Panic set in. And he ran. Don’t let them go, don’t let them go, faded away as he ran towards the barrier between the crowds and the tarmac; yet it seemed to be getting louder, the same phrase thumping inside his head.

John was screaming out a name he hadn’t spoken for so long. He repeated it over and over as two security guards grabbed his shoulders and pulled him away from the barrier he was scrambling to climb.

“No, you can’t – let me go! Let me go!” He screamed the name again. “Fletcher! FLETCHER!” Yet Fletcher Brown could not hear John over the noise of the crowds. Fletcher Brown continued to smile as he marched in unison to the sounds of trumpets. “Let go of me! I have to get to my son!”

The tears in John’s eyes clouded his view of Fletcher, making his parade uniform transform into a military uniform; the flag he was holding transform into a rifle. Soon he wouldn’t have a name. “Let go of me!” Only a number. “How DARE you!” Or a statistic. “Fletcher!” Left, right, left, right. “FLETCHER!” Don’t let them go, don’t let them go.

One of the security guards pushed John to the ground and stamped away. Still full of the bewildering adrenaline that accompanies panic, John rushed towards his wife. But there was nothing he could do. Nothing any of them could do. John wiped the tears from his face as he looked over to see the boy still smiling as he boarded the sky vessel.

For all of his eighteen years, Fletcher Brown had never been so unaware before in his life.

and the results are in

2011-12-16T17:50:00.003+11:00

Haircut.

Thought I should update the world on how I went in my HSC. It would be a bit shit of me to spend the whole of the last two years blogging all about it, and then not actually telling anyone how I went.

I don't like the idea of telling anyone though, as I know that lots of people didn't get the marks they wanted or needed and I felt I couldn't tell some of my friends what I got without feeling like I was bragging or making them feel bad.

But of course, to all my friends who may read this, you must remember that an ATAR is just some number that judges you based on marks that don't actually reflect your skills, intelligence and ability. I know so many people who think it's the end of the world, and it really isn't.

Having a good ATAR of course would help you get into university easier, but its not the only way. There is TAFE, second round offers for uni, colleges, anything! Things work out well in the end for those who try, and trying your hardest is the only thing anyone can ask for.

Having said that, there are those who have complained about getting a crap ATAR, and in all honesty, with some of these people (the ones I dislike because I'm bias like that) I wonder how they thought they would, when I know the lack of effort they put in.

And now it comes to the time when I sound like a bitch and everyone goes shut up, you just said all this stuff about an ATAR not being everything and you actually went really well, we hate you, go die.

So what did I get? In order of best to worst marks...

Multimedia - 97/100 (Band 6)
English Extension 1 - 44/50 (E3)
Modern History - 85/100 (Band 5)
Ancient History - 85/100 (Band 5)
English Advanced - 84/100 (Band 5)
History Extension - 35/100 (E3)

ATAR 87.75

So, I got in the high 80s with my ATAR. I only had to get over 75 so I'm most certainly in my course at UOW that I got Early Entry for! I'm ready to do some communicating and some media-studying next year!

The principal wasn't as happy with my result, as he was expecting to have bragging-rights over my supposed 99.99 ATAR which never happened, but I don't care. I got the result I wanted, not what the school wanted.

I will add that I am very proud of all my friends, in particular Divya, Aneesa and my cousin Lachlan for their really great results that they deserved so, so, so, so much.

I hate these kinds of posts where I talk about my achievements and it makes others feel like shit. But I've written it now, like ripping off a bandaid very quickly.

the making of

2011-12-14T19:21:00.001+11:00

Welcome to the Making Of, or the Behind the Scenes, or whatever you want to call it. Now, for a Multimedia major work, the basic aim is to create something that exhibits lots and lots and lots of multimedia skills.

I decided to make an animation that was on Self Esteem, therefore making it a product that would exhibit my skills and also have a purpose in the school, becoming a part of those crappy PBIS lessons I would always complain about.

It was 2D cartoons animated in front of real life backgrounds of places around the school, in order to allow students to develop a sense of familiarity. In addition to this, I also developed an online game that was virtually the same story, only with more questions and interactivity.

Click all images to see larger

So what skills did I exhibit? Within this animation, there were skills involved in tweening and tracking. There was also voice recordings needed, backgrounds to be filmed, special effects to be created such as the Earth Zoom, sound editing, video editing, game development ... so there was quite a lot happening, okay?

To begin with I had to research how to go through this process. I looked up sites, other cartoons, tried out various test pieces to see what would work best. I also put out a survey for the teachers to do, asking what aspects of PBIS they liked and didn't.

I also interviewed Head of Welfare. In addition, I had a meeting with the PBIS committee laying out my plans, with the Head of PBIS of the area in attendance. All the people at the meeting seemed intrigued by my idea, so they approved of me continuing it.

The process of creating the project, in a quick summary, involved drawings, a detailed script, a 27-paged storyboard outlining the whole thing, a storyboard for the game, designing, printing, designing, more designing, testing, failing, fixing, testing, being successful, burning DVDs and more.

At one stage I had a group of friends over to record the voices including Robert, James, Natalie, Cameron and Kate, which was a fun but exhausting day. I did the voices of Dad, PBIS Woman and Popular Guy, while Kate did Girly Girl, Cameron did Mr Teacher Sir, Robert did Shy Kid, James did Average Dude and Natalie did Mum.

The animating took the longest to do, longer than I was expecting it to take. Animating about 20 minutes worth of stuff took months and months on end. This led to the sleep deprivation I complained of this whole year, as I'd be up at 3am many, many nights. Many, many, painful nights.

I even went on stage during an assembly to advertise the 'lessons' that were coming up for everyone, as the whole school was to be involved in my project. Along with this were mysterious posters that were put up all around the school.

Pretty much the products at the end consisted of the animation, the game and print media – posters, teacher's guides, student work sheets, DVD printing, DVD cover printing, any other signs used on presentation days to guide students to the correct classes.

There were two presentation days! One I completely missed helping set up for, and the second I did help set up. It was the weirdest experience hearing my animation being played inside all the classrooms. There was also a great response to them!

Following its presentation, I had another interview with Head of Welfare to point out how successful she had deemed the animation. She believed that I had tuned into the appeal of the students, so that they were both entertained as well as informed. I did another survey, with the whole school, which came with positive results.

I also had to set up the project for the markers, so that they could come in and look at everything I had produced. I think I did a good job with this as well!

In addition, it must be noted, I had to create a portfolio to go with it, which is what some of these images I've attached with the post are from. The portfolio could be up to 80 pages, but because I did mine as an A3 document, I was allowed 40 pages which I went right up to, cramming in as much information as possible.

So, that was my major work for Multimedia! And well worth it in the end, with a mark of 97 for Multimedia.

PAST POSTS
Shying Away from Scripting – October 25, 2010
If I Were a Flower – December 16, 2010
"Yes Mum" – January 11, 2011
Teaser – May 19, 2011
In Week Eight! – June 1, 2011
Anticipation – June 7, 2011
Be a Superhero – June 10, 2011
In High Esteem – June 14, 2011
Marking Suggestions – August 14, 2011
The Big Day – August 19, 2011

shying away

2011-12-14T19:21:00.000+11:00

I think it's safe enough for me to write about my Multimedia Major Work now, which was entitled Shying Away. Watch the whole thing below! I have put it into four parts as it was easier then to cut out the pauses for question time that were included during its presentation at school.

Click the widescreen buttons to see larger.

With the HSC results coming in today, I found out that I got a mark of 97 for Multimedia, so this project, which was 50 percent of my total marks, seemed to have been well worth the effort!

Also, if you want to see a very brief summary on how I made this project, have a look at the next post!

cooking metaphors

2011-12-13T23:45:00.000+11:00

Jen and I at Presentation Evening, the old school captains

Tonight was my school's usual Presentation Evening, that I always go to so I thought it would be nice to attend once again, this time as someone who was no longer a student. I emphasised this by not wearing uniform along with most other graduated Year 12s.

It was actually a really lovely evening. When all the graduated Year 12s went backstage to line up for awards, we kept getting told off by the Roadies for talking so much, but we all hadn't seen each other very much and it was great to catch up. Even in the dark, backstage.

Jen and I were surprised to have to go on stage and receive awards for being captains, which was my first of many awkward appearances on stage. Ever since I've graduated, I have felt weird being back at school, and being on stage receiving awards was no different.

So I got that award. And I also came first in all of my six subjects, two I was equal-first in, which resulted in me also being DUX of Year 12! As they usually do a 'book prize' with the subject awards, yet we wouldn't have been at school for this, we all instead got vouchers.

Normally, the graduated Year 12s receive Borders vouchers, but since it had closed down, we ended up with Woolworths Limited vouchers. The list of stores I can use it is quite ... Limited. I can choose between Big W, Woolworths, Dick Smiths – or I can use it at three different liquor stores.

I felt this was the best. I have $150 dollars worth of vouchers that I can use to spend on alcohol, thanks to the school. Keeping in line with their usual silliness and illogicality.

I did have two awards I didn't have a clue I was getting until Kieran told me about them this afternoon. I received a Defense Force award for leadership and teamwork, which included a $500 cheque! Nice!

Also I received the Caltex Award for All-Round-Awesomeness. It isn't actually called that. I just know it was an All-Rounder award and I'm not near the award in order to write specifics.

The joke of the night was that this award included sporting excellence, even though I don't recall participating in any kind of sport this year. Which is kind of awkward.

And that was my night. As I thought it would, it made me feel proud of my apparent achievements and built up my confidence only in preparation for it to be completely destroyed tomorrow, at precisely 6 in the morning.

Tomorrow I will receive a text giving me my HSC marks. Then the next day I will be able to find out my ATAR. Now. Yes. Now I am scared.

What made it worse is that tonight all the teachers kept coming up to me and being very positive about me getting a really amazing ATAR. I know I will get enough to get into university. I know that anything over 75 will please me.

But I know that the school thinks I'm going to be their golden student that gets 99.98. The DUX last year got 98. I'm not going to live up to that, which doesn't bother me, but I know it will disappoint the school. Ah well.

But, in the end, I own beige pants. And this, my friends, is why I win at life no matter what happens.

post exam showcase

2011-12-11T21:00:00.000+11:00

It's time to start posting random things I have created during the year that are school-related but I wasn't able to post due to the fact that if the HSC markers googled stuff to ensure it wasn't plagiarism, they could potentially find it online and this would be bad.

I figure they have finished marking everything by now. Yes? Hopefully, otherwise they are a little behind. I get my results in 3 days, and my ATAR in 4. I've spent all this time relaxing since the end of exams, and now that little extra stress has returned, in suspense for the day I get texted my results.

So here's a story that is the one I ended up writing for my English paper, having to bend it more to connect to belonging in 'places', and it still worked well nonetheless. You'll find it's quite similar to this story I posted a while back, only now it has historical context and works much better. Enjoy.

The Guilt That Followed
by Seán O’Gorman

Another town, another street, and I continue my search. The rain falls from the black sky, failing to cool down the thick, warm air yet succeeding in dampening my mood. The darkness in the street tries to grab at me as I stagger over the rubble and debris that still remains. The rain disregards my jacket and soaks through, into my suit, confirming to me that it is August once again.

I make my way over to the solitary intact building, where the light pours out into the street through the glass panels on the old wooden door and the inhabitants have immersed themselves in the noise of their terrifying happiness. All those towns, all those streets, and so many of them unfriendly. But I know I will have to go into the bar.

I have to find her.

The nearest lamp post – still crumpled and rendered useless – is where I tape one of the several posters I clutch in my shaking hands.

To another crumpled lamp post I go, to another, and another. The ripping sound of the tape cuts harshly into the silence, yet I am comforted by the incomprehensible and faint sound of some old tune playing inside the bar. I try to look away from the poster as quickly as I can but her mystical eyes draw me in.

We stare at each other. She is frozen in time, smiling through me in black and white, as I stare back solemnly, almost as dull in colour as the posters. Toshiko. My daughter. Taken from me too soon.
All because of me.

I can hold back no longer. I have to go into the bar.

I look up at the building. The rain runs in streaks down the strong brick walls, past the two teary-eyed windows upstairs. I turn the old brass door handle and I can’t help but think of something as I enter the building: this bar is a survivor, worn and alone and but still going on. Like me.

I have grown use to the silence that ensues upon my arrival. The old tune continues, yet most of the patrons have gone quiet, inspecting this strange man at their door. The many staring eyes are cold enough to freeze the tears against my face. Despite the warmth of August, it is very cold in here.

An ageing man with a brilliant wisp of white hanging from his chin approaches me from the other side of the counter. “Konbanwa.” Good evening. “What would you like?” He scratches his head and raises an eyebrow when I don’t respond. “Sir?”

I apologise, then lift up one of the posters with one of my trembling hands. The man looks apologetic as he takes the poster from me, but by the time he reads the details on the poster, his sympathy turns into confusion. He passes the poster back.

“Please show them. I need to find her.” My voice comes out all croaky. He shakes his head. “Please!”

“Sir, I ... there is ... there is no point.” His words sting and I find it difficult to speak for a moment.

“How– how dare you!” Quickly the anger builds. “Show them the poster! Show them! Help me! You have to help me! I need to find my daughter!”

“Let go of me!” I come to a realisation that my hands are grabbing at the ageing man’s collar violently, my face pressed up against his. I let go and try to maintain my breathing but the patrons of the bar have now completely stopped to watch the scene occurring at the counter. The old tune has stopped.

“Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” The ageing man says calmly yet sternly as he forcibly shoves me out through the door. I trip and land upon the rubble on the ground. Back into the darkness I go. The old tune, the light, and the loud and harsh conversation all continue as I get up, clutching the scrunched posters in my hand.

And then the images came back to me. That day in August. The weather had been the same, only the rain had felt cheerier as it hit my face walking on my way to work. I had walked into work that day, and driven out with a company car. I had finally succeeded. I had made it to the top after all my efforts.

I had spent the day moving to my new office. I had spent the night celebrating with Hatsuyo and the children. And then I spent the next morning alone and afraid and crying in terror.

That next morning. The worst day of my life.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see a streak of brilliant green. I turn to find, reaching out of a mound of rocks and dust, a single flower. The petals are closed, but I know it is alive. It is a survivor.

I’m almost at my car, ready to continue on, despite my exhaustion, when there is a great flash of light. Fear rattles through my body. I dive to the ground. I cover my skin. I think, no, oh no, not again. Yet I breathe a sigh of relief as I hear the sound of the debris crunching beneath the wheels of a car that has rolled up beside me. The engine goes off. Two figures approach me and as my eyes adjust to the light, I see a police officer standing further back as a lady comes to my side.

It’s Hatsuyo. She steps towards me with arms open, hopelessness in her eyes. “They said you’d already left work and I didn’t know where you were. You didn’t tell me you were going out again tonight. You don’t tell me these things anymore.”

I don’t respond, I feel no need. “I’m sorry Yoshida, but we’ve been through this before. Come home. You know there is no point in going on looking for her.” I could tell that those last words were as hard for her to say as they were hard for me to hear.

I look away, refusing her hug – almost like a sulking child. My hair falls in front of my eyes, shielding me from her gaze. Why must they always stop me? I want to find her! I want to help! Why does everyone else seem to not care anymore? Why must I do this on my own?

Hatsuyo opens her mouth to speak, and I know what she is going to say but I don’t want to hear it. “You know what happened 3 years ago. You can’t keep denying it.”

I finally speak. “It means nothing. She could still be alive. I know it. I just have to find her.” It’s almost as if she has given in to a compromise. How can she just accept that her daughter is ...? The old tune has ended, a new song starts. The conversations continue in the pub. Life goes on. Life can’t go on. Life can’t go on with out her.

“She’s gone, Yoshida! Gone! I’m sorry, but you have to accept this. You can’t reject this any longer. Remember the day we lost her? Remember what happened that day? The worst day of our lives.”

The flash. The silence. The falling. The dust. The screams. The blood. The terror.

Hatsuyo had wanted me to look after Toshiko as she had to go out to visit her ill mother, taking our baby son with her. But I didn’t. First day in the top job and I wanted to get into work, in my new suit and my company car. So I did. I said my goodbyes to Toshiko, as I left her alone in the house that morning.

How horrible. I still think of her eating breakfast alone as the bomb fell. When I was able to return to my street later, I couldn’t even work out where my house had been amongst the rubble and debris, through the clouds of smoke, through my tears, through the screams, through the pain.

All because of me.

And I let it out. A final scream of grief, anguish, terror, anger, guilt. My daughter is looking up at me from the poster on the ground. Those beautiful eyes are staring at the father who let her down.

I fall to my knees, sobbing into my hands but my tears have dried up and I don’t feel like crying anymore. I have accepted it. Hatsuyo comes to my side, stroking my hair. “I feel so alone,” I whisper.

“You are not alone. I know you feel bad for leaving her alone that morning. But think of your son. He needs you too. I need you. And you need us,” She pauses. “Come home.”

I’m doing the same thing to them. First I had been neglected my daughter and now I had been neglecting my wife and my son. How could I have been so selfish? I know I let down Toshiko, but it is time to turn things around.

Hatsuyo gestures to the police officer who drives away, leaving us to walk over the rubble to my company car. The engine starts up. I have to go back home.

She puts her hand on mine as we drive away from the street with the lonely old bar. I look out the window to see the lonely flower opening up as sky lightens. We travel through the towns and the streets, watching as Hiroshima comes back to life.

proving the point again

2011-12-09T01:57:00.001+11:00

I always say that technology is against me. And it is! Mum always tells me how stupid that statement is. Well, mother, here's some proof to add to your pudding of ignorance.

So I have this job to do. I have to take photos and video of a Year 10 Formal. Sounds easy enough, and I'm getting paid too. I turn up, take photos and video, done and done, thank you very much sir.

No. Not done and done. This is what everyone else thinks. They think I turn up, take some photos and video, and the rest is easy. No, that was the easy part there. Now I have hours of work to go through. By this point I'm not actually complaining. I know the editing, burning, printing part takes the longest and sometimes its okay.

But mostly I don't enjoy it. And do you know why? Because of technology.

It's times likes these when I really hate it with a passion. When I've been editing the video down slowly over the week to have the program crash and wipe it all, so that I have to start again from the scratch the day before it needs to be done.

When I have to pick out all the shots again one by one, and then I have to edit all together which takes hours. When I can't go in to school to show the finished product, because it's still taking forever. When I finish the video, but then exporting becomes a problem.

Exporting. The bastard. When I export it as a movie file, and it works perfectly fine, great quality, 2GB, and then I start burning the DVD. It takes 20 minutes to begin with, and every subsequent DVD burning should take 5 minutes each.

When I realise I have to make 100 copies and using one computer isn't going to be enough. When I get my mum's, brother's and dad's computers in order to burn more than one at a time.

When Dad suggests to use Toast Titanium to burn the DVDs but it takes longer and seems to need to scan the original DVD every time it copies a new one. When we're screaming at each other because he's being a prick, and I'm being a prick back. When the family leave me to it, going off to a Spicks and Specks live show that I was supposed to go to, and actually arranged and was the most excited for.

When I find out that Toast is actually burning the copies without the DVD-ROM files on it, rendering the whole DVD nearly pointless. When I only realise 6 copies in, and find myself wasting DVDs.

When I revert back to the idea of putting the iDVD files on each computer, only to find this doesn't work because the video file I'm burning isn't 'self-contained' so my options are either moving over ALL the files onto the other computers (20GB worth) or exporting the video again as a 'self-contained' file which will be about 300mb and shitty quality, but for some stupid reason will actually take hours to export.

When I finally decide upon doing this at about 8.30pm. When it takes an hour to export, and the quality isn't as good anymore. When I go to put it on another computer, only to find the iDVD file is 'locked' by my original computer. When I find myself creating a new iDVD file from scratch, mimicking the original design so I can start burning.

When I find myself dragging files from a USB in lots since the USB isn't big enough. When I have to repeat the same process of creating the iDVD project from scratch again so I can start burning on a third computer.

When this third computer keeps spitting the DVDs out halfway but allowing me to put them back in to burn, but forcing me to stop to test it out on the DVD player every time to make sure. When I start testing back previously burnt discs on this computer and the computer keeps telling me they are blank, so I start making this huge pile of wasted DVDs, only to find that that computer is being a retard, and I find that most of them actually do work, just not on this computer.

When I spend the next four or five hours sitting around watching the three computers burn discs, moving back and forth between them in this tedious cycle.

When I finally finish burning them all at 12.30am, and decide to start the printing process, whereby I will print some simple text onto each one. Should only take up to 2 hours if I'm unlucky.

When I realise that I can get even unluckier.

When the printer decides that it can't print files from memory cards anymore. Or from USBs. Like it has done everyday since its existed. When I find myself printing out the design and attempting to scan it with the printer (as it can print from scanned files), only to find that it can't find the piece of paper to scan even though the piece of paper is clearly where all paper goes to be scanned and by this point I figure it must be screwing with my mind because this shit can't be happening.

When I try different file types, different ways of trying to get the text onto the printer to print. When I find that the printer picks up photos taken by my DSLR, I take a photo of the previously-failed-to-be-scanned piece of paper. (When technology screws me over even down to the point where the camera can't focus properly on the paper). The photo finally makes it onto the printer, but it will print out the grey on the background, therefore wasting way too much ink. It also won't crop correctly.

When it's 2.16 in the morning and I feel like I've been completely defeated by technology in the worst possible way. It screwed me over with editing. It screwed me over with exporting. It screwed me over with burning. It even screwed me over with printing, normally the easiest part!

And it's times like these when you think FUCK EVERYTHING YOU FUCKING PIECES OF FUCKING SHIT TECHNOLOGY THAT CAN'T EVEN FUCKING WORK WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK OFF AND FIND OTHER PIECES OF TECHNOLOGY LIKE YOURSELF THAT ARE JUST AS FUCKING USELESS AND CONGREGATE IN ONE AREA SO AS TO ALLOW ME TO DROP FUCKING BOMBS INTO THIS AREA SO AS TO DESTROY ALL YOU STUPID FUCKING SHIT PIECES OF SHIT FUCKING SHIT TECHNOLOGY.

I'm off to bed. If the school is really disappointed with the lack of printing on the discs, they can come read this blog post and then go fuck themselves.

I apologise for my language. But unluckier is actually a legitimate word.

morbid stop motion

2011-12-03T17:55:00.000+11:00

Natalie, Emma and I made this claymation in Year 11. Natalie and I caught up yesterday and we started back on finishing it, as we never actually ever completed it and it will still on my computer gathering dust.

We got to work and I just finished putting it together just then. It's so very dodgy, and I know this, but I thought I should keep it how it originally looked otherwise it wouldn't be as amazing(ly crap) as it is.

The story goes that an Emo Child tries to cut himself, finds that it creates orchestral music, and continues until he actually cuts off his hand and bleeds to death. Morbid, right?

Well, don't be judging. I have no idea what sick people made this up* and I don't know what sick teacher allowed them to do it**. They were even going to show this on assembly back when we were supposed to have finished it.

Actually, come to think of it, this was one of those Visual Design projects that no one ever finished and our teacher gave up on, so it was just kind of swept under the rug and no more was said about it.

Also, notice how the character seems to have been the inspiration for a certain Shy Kid in a certain PBIS presentation? Yeah, you got it!

In fact, the plasticine character now 'lives', squished, inside a plastic container which is his mausoleum. He just sits there on my book shelf looking lifeless.

But at least the video is complete! Partly because I live a sad existence, partly because I have the time to do it, and mostly because these two aspects work hand in hand at times.

Not much has been happening in terms of my existence recently. Just been chilling. You know, like a mad guy. Sweet. I did however go to the Year 10 formal and take photos and video with Val which I found pretty difficult to do, but now I have the editing of it to go! Plus other design work. Plus partying.

It's all happening here! Feeling like your lacking some busyness in your life? I can lend you some.

And now I go away.

*Well, it was us.
**WATERS! It was YOU!

time to suit up!

2011-12-01T14:21:00.001+11:00

Happy 1st of December! It's now officially summer, and the weather ain't too bad either!

I'm quite cheery at the moment. I love it. This morning I went to Wollongong for my university scholarship interview. Surprisingly, I wasn't really all that nervous about it in the first place. Suppose I hadn't had time to even think about it properly.

I was quite nervous this morning as I drove in (slowly at 80km the whole way – I hate being a Learner) but then I was talking to the girls in the Dean's Scholars Room and felt much happier and confident.

I had this nice young lady and this nice old man to interview me. Firstly, they thought my name was Thomas but then realised they were reading the wrong name off the list and that Thomas wouldn't actually be coming in as he is in the UK.

It felt like I was being comforted rather than interviewed. Rather than asking the hard-hitting questions I had been warned about, they seemed more interested in just chatting about what I plan to do.

I told them my future plans, the subjects I did, the animation I made for the school, how I will be living down there, and the fact that I had it all sorted pleased them to no end. They were so impressed with me, and that was even before I mentioned the school-wide education video and then they were blown away. It was wierd to have these two people just sit there and think I'm amazing.

Very lovely. Dad had been waiting at a coffee shop while I was in there, then he decided to walk around the campus trying to remember where he used to go to lectures and such. Then we got lost for a bit but finally found the car and returned home.

Now I'm sitting at home feeling all motivated to do stuff. Anything! I love that hit of confidence you get from something like that. I've cleaned my room a little bit, to the extent of which I am able to without spending 5 hours on it.

Now tonight I have a Year 10 formal to film and photograph, which I think will be fine, but I may get distracted and just start talking to teachers and students. I hope I do a good job. It may be difficult to get great video happening, but I will see. They'll pay me anyway. Well they better.

But before that, in 2 hours time, I have a million other things to do, so I'm gonna go now. Hoorah for pointless paragraphs as blog posts. Eh, whatever, this is what I'm offering.

Now comes the countdown to the 14th and 15th to find out my ATAR.
Nail-biting stuff, I can assure you.

a wonderful dilemma

2011-11-29T15:33:00.000+11:00

I'm still trying to get use to this whole not-having-anything-productive-to-do-with-my-time thing.

Having no job still and having nothing really giving me a structure to my life at the moment can both be good and bad. Good in terms of being able to do whatever I want: I can go out with people, I can read books, watch movies, I can even blog for the sake of blogging.

However, it is also bad in terms of making me incredibly lazy. I've only done half the things I was supposed to have done by now. Most of it wasn't even my fault today. Confusing and stupid email communications can get long, tedious and frustrating, especially when it involves my old high school. Will they ever become efficient?

I still haven't gotten a haircut either. And my design work for the Interior Design website was supposed to have some aspects finished over a week ago that I still haven't been able to do properly because things get in the way!

Tonight I'm rehearsing again for As Long As Its Natural which I haven't memorised enough at all, but it will come to me I suppose. Also, my bed rarely gets made, and sometimes only 5 minutes before I actually get back into it again.

So with all the socialising and the important things I'm having to do also, little things I need to get done keep getting swept under the rug. Which is remarkable, because I don't even have a rug.

So might I be blogging for the sake of blogging?! Yeah, that and perhaps trying to ease my OCD-like irritation over having not blogged as regularly as I normally did.

It was good during exams. I told myself it would be cool to have less posts, because it makes it look like I'm doing all this hard study, and makes the HSC seem more epic. So only having a few posts didn't annoy me.

But it was difficult getting back into the swing of it, and now the numbers probably won't be even. Just like how I don't like going over 20 posts per month. It's just a thing. Yeah. OCD.

But yes, even the fact that I haven't blogged enough this month shows you how busy I've been. Everything's been getting away from me. I was going to do Youtube videos, and am trying, but its difficult to find time.

Yes, dear reader, I've been cursed with a very enjoyable problem. Before, I couldn't do anything because I was doing the HSC. Now, I can't do some fun things because all the other fun things are getting in the way! What a thing to whinge about! Bah!

Like, just yesterday, I went to school to hand in a book and a tax invoice, while Louise and her friend Catherine, waited for me in the school car park. Then it was Mondos for lunch with the addition of Aneesa, Ken and Manal. Then Aneesa and I bought me a sexy shirt. Then we got ready. Then we got on a train to the city. Then we featured as amazing extras with Rosie for a film being made by Aneesa's friend Alex and others. And it was great fun.

Probably long and tedious for many, but I was so amused by it. I hope they do well with it and can actually make it into a series or whatever. I will totally be in it! As extras, we managed to be in the shots for significant parts so I'm pleased.

I'm seeing no logical conclusion or end piece to this post, seeing as there was not a proper theme to go with. So perhaps I'll just have this suddenly end.

casually being awesome

2011-11-26T23:42:00.000+11:00

I recently got a nose piercing. I had said I wanted to get one for a while now, only Mum had denied me going to get it done, using the excuse that I could do it once I was 18.

So now that I was 18, I figured I would. The night before, I decided that I was going to do it, so Morgan and Jess took me to a place to get it done. The lady was nice, but she did tell me to stop fussing. Apparently I bled more than most people do. And it bloody hurt, having a needle shoved through my nose.

In fact, I applaud those who have piercings now. I don't understand how any of you can put up with the initial pain, then the discomfort, all for the sake of having a piece of metal hanging off you. However, I must admit, I love the nose ring! Can't wait for the 6 weeks to be over, so I can put in a thinner ring of my choosing.

Mum and Dad didn't expect me to ever do it, so once I returned that night donning my new piercing, the response was pretty much an 'Oh dear', but they seem to like it now too.

I had my first proper rehearsal of As Long As Its Natural with Kenney on the same day, which was more fun than I thought it would be. I'm no actor in any way, but the movements, stage directions and specifics on dialogue we created are going to be very difficult for me to not laugh at when we properly do it. Also should possibly start memorising the script...

I also registered for an ABN, so now I officially exist as a business. This is in order for me to be able to actually do the photography and video job for the Year 10 formal, which I will be getting paid for! Not only am I getting paid to go to a formal event, I get to re-use my formal outfit and look extra-cool with my piercing now.

A group of us went out for dinner and drinks as a farewell kind of thing to all the girls and Josh going off to Schoolies! I have not done the Schoolies thing, not because I think it's stupid, but because I never got around to organising anything properly with anyone.

People bag on about how stupid Schoolies is, but it isn't the event as such, its those who attend it who give it the bad name it has. When people go on about how instead of going to Schoolies, they were getting paid to work, I feel its a bit silly.

Firstly, because what they're practically saying is, is that they prefer doing work over going on a holiday with friends. Secondly, because Schoolies is what they make it. They wouldn't have to go and die and get arrested if they didn't want to.

On jobs, I had a pretty successful semi-interview with a guy at a pizza place, where he thought I'd not only be useful as a pizza guy, but also as a graphic designer! I don't think he needs anymore staff at the moment unfortunately, but it was a funny chat to have. I felt really socially awkward, but anyway.

I also got a call to say I made it to the Dean's Scholar interviews the other day! This excited me greatly, and excited me even further when the email that arrived later used the word 'short-listed' making me sound awesome and exclusive.

But yes, I have an interview next week! I'll probably get nervous about it later, but at the moment I'm kind of fine about it, because I figure they'll just ask me about school achievements, and my interests – and they would actually have to stop me from talking about that kind of thing.

So yeah. You know, just casually being awesome.

showers expected

2011-11-22T02:34:00.000+11:00

by Seán O’Gorman

and that was the weather!
the television set goes blank again
can’t bear to see the plastic man on
the plastic screen

the man who’s allowed to be wrong
the too-white smile leaves an
after image in your head
mocking. teasing.

but listen close. listen, listen!
will reach a top of 20,
yet outside it’s snowing

the icy hands of self loathing
claw at your shivering face
freezing tears on your cheeks

there’s chances of showers
and there’s chances of thunderstorms
increasing in possibility!
can’t take chances.

well, if cliffs are made for jumping
should do it right now, jump
yet risks cannot be taken
too much at stake

the man who has to get it right.
the reality of life
is that things change for good

but good for good,
or bad for good?
the indecision.

and that was that
the never satisfied, the undeserving
the decisions taking
turns for the worst
and that was the whether.

A bit of a depressing, wanky poem by myself. I apologise if it not up to your poetic standard. I wrote this before the exams began, trying to portray how frightening I could see the future being, and how I don't have the will power to take risks. The same applies still, only I was focusing on exams back then. Now it apples to life in general. There are chances and opportunities, but will my own self get in the way of allowing these chances to occur? I'm never the risk taker. Perhaps I need to change this. It's 2.30 in the morning. I think I'll sleep off my deep-and-meaningful-ness.

don't take me tongue tied

2011-11-20T18:30:00.000+11:00

I've been a party animal recently. I feel like I've had my first glimpse into actual nightlife, into the world of partying, drinking and clubbing. Ever since my own birthday party, I feel as if I've had a constant flow of alcohol in my blood stream, which is probably not the best thing.

I've had my party, I had my first legally bought drink at the Catholic Club, and now I've also been actual proper clubbing. Which was a weird experience.

A group of us went to Hot Damn! which I think is a club, or something, in the city. We went there for Jess' birthday, first stopping at Century Bar, which was Mexican-themed that night, and had a couple of drinks for cheap. Showing ID at the door to that place felt terrifying, since the guy also had one of those security swipey thingies to detect stuff on us.

Hot Damn was school-themed that night, celebrating the end of school and the like. My half-arsed effort was greatly emphasised by the great deal of trouble everyone else attending went to for the theme. And it was pretty fun I guess.

I'm not sure clubbing is exactly my cup of tea though. Saying that, I don't like tea either, so a cup of tea wouldn't be my tea either. But it's just so loud, and intense, and involved dancing and socialising with people I don't know.

I'm far too shy to be able to deal with such a social situation, but it was okay to just sit back and chill, even if by doing that, security thought that Jamie, Jake and I were looking 'sus', even though we had jackets in the corner of our booth, not drugs.

We went to Hungry Jacks after. Then caught a train at 4 in the morning back home. I walked home from the station, and it was really weird being up at that time. It's a strange mix of people awake at 5. There's those like us who were coming home from a night out, in direct contrast to those who had just woken up to go to work.

As I walked home, the sky had become quite a bit lighter. I could smell breakfast being cooked in some houses. I got home when Dad was getting ready for work. I just went straight to sleep. My bed has never felt so soft and comfy.

Although I was being anti-social at Hot Damn, it seems to have brought out some kind of confidence in me now, seeing as I was able to talk without being a social retard when I went to Macarthur Tavern the next night with Aneesa, Daniel and Isabelle.

Maybe because the Tavern in contrast to Hot Damn was far more relaxed, I felt more within my comfort zone. We tried dancing to the Ministry of Sound who were performing that night, but no one else on the dance floor seemed really into it.

We later found Jamie and Brad, then went to Maccas for what became a meal deal, when an order got mixed up and we scored so much more extra food.

Good night! I had quite a few different drinks. Although I did fail to drink a disgusting beer which Daniel will never let me live down. This story of my beer fail was carried on by Dean the next day at Jess' surprise 18th party.

The party was awesome, although the blind-folded Jess guessed where she was. Blind-fold off, SURPRISE!, and the party had begun.

Dean decided that since I had never gotten properly drunk before, that this was the new aim of his night. A bottle and a half of vodka later, shared mostly between the two of us, and I was quite, quite gone. To a great extent.

Although, I do remember everything. I just hope I didn't scare Mitch too much. I know I scared Robert. Sorry Robert.

Yet again, I walked home with my walking-buddies Josh and Lauren. We made two friends on the way – this lady who knew Josh's brothers, and a man called David who was clearly smashed. Despite being so polite in shaking our hands, he did have a rather concerning bruise on his face.

Still, what can you do? This is night life for you! It's potentially dangerous and strangely friendly at the same time. Last night was the worst though, as in when I got home. I had drunk so much, my head was spinning and I even got heartburn that kept waking me up. Now I'm almost feeling normal again.

This kind of life may be exciting but my god, it hurts the day after. Everything just always hurts. Would not be able to do this kind of thing on a regular basis.

So, I'm going to make sure I don't drink for at least a week. That would be nice. I need to cut down on the partying for a bit. I'm an old man and I need my rest.

Sorry I haven't been posting as frequently. I have been so busy. From going out places, to trying to recover the days after, I haven't had the will power to write anything up. I'll get back into the full swing of it eventually, I guess.

a little self deprecation

2011-11-19T01:05:00.000+11:00

Okay, before you say anything, yes I know this will just sound like I'm pointlessly whingeing about everything and anything, but this is a way for me to express my thoughts and get this out and I just have this need to lay out my concerns for all to see.

I've been thinking about the future again. Ah, that damned future of mine! I hate thinking about the future. It was fine before. I could say anything about it before, and it didn't really matter because I was in school and school is all I knew and it was safe.

Now, I'm free. Let loose upon the world! And, what, I'm supposed to take the world on in this amazing display of confidence and brilliance? This is what I've always thought. Perhaps no one really has these expectations of me? Perhaps these are just my expectations of myself?

Okay, so call me pretentious! I believe I'm destined for great things. Well, I think so anyway. Others seem to think so too. It is not unusual for me to hear someone say 'You're going to be so rich when you're older', or 'Can I get your autograph now so I can sell it in the future when you're famous?'.

I don't know. I know I've got a talent in film making. And even to some extent writing. And I've always seen myself as being someone important. When I was younger, I thought I'd be some famous author. More recently, it became some famous film maker, or TV presenter.

But, the thing is, it's my own personality. I feel limited by my own personality, and the fact I feel limited by my own personality is probably what is limiting me.

I have potential I guess. But the problem is I can never see myself reaching this full potential. Take my high school exams for example. All these teachers are still counting on me being some amazing genius who scores them some brilliant mark that makes the school proud.

Even though I've said how I decided I'd do the exams for myself – meaning I did them as well as I could while not stressing myself out – I do still feel horrible to not think I did my absolutely, potentially death-inducing, hardest in the exams. And when I get results back, they may be enough for me to get into my university course, but they may not be enough to be a remarkable result, and this annoys me.

Why? No fucking clue.

I think its because its all I have to show for myself. I hear of others my age, and they have 20 jobs, and girlfriends or boyfriends – or even just relationship problems! – and piercings and tattoos that make them interesting, and hobbies that they have taken beyond just taking part in, and qualifications and achievements other than school ones. And then I look at me. Yeah, I can come first in all the subjects I bloody well want at school, but where's that gotten me? Bloody nowhere.

Well, that's harsh I guess. It's gotten me early entry into uni courses. But, yet again, that's just more educational achievement. Where's the interest and appeal of me? Where's the aspects of my life I will talk about in the future to my grand children that will have them devouring my every word in awe at my accomplishments?

I have no confidence. Which is a shame. And probably the only thing I could possibly wish for. I wouldn't mind not being intelligent if it meant I was confident enough to make new friends, talk to strangers, get myself out in the world.

No outgoing person here. Move on, find someone else, someone who isn't shy and cowering in the corner and looking like a real downer.

I've been reading Stephen Fry's autobiography. Now, there's a accomplished man. And I read through his life, and he does all these things, and participates in all these plays and such. And it's like... all these opportunities were available to him, which he took on. And there's no shortage of opportunities presented to me, either.

It was his confidence. He could just go right in there, do things, get involved, get known, make friends, reach a level of success beyond what he rightly thought he would reach.

And now there's me. I feel like my life will just become a series of missed opportunities. Take just girls for example. Girl at party tells her friend that she thinks I'm attractive. What do I do? Have an awkward conversation with her, where she assumes that I'm going out with the girl I'm constantly with at the party because I haven't left her side because I'm too shy to talk to all the scary strangers. Never get her number.

At a club recently. Girl talking to me. But I have no idea what to say back. All I can think about it how I'm not good enough to even talk to her, or whatever.

Meanwhile, others are meeting people, adding them online, chatting, blah, blah, blah, friends, relationships... like, it wouldn't even occur to me to talk to someone I didn't know that well and become better acquainted.

I'm just a hopeless case. And the fact I think that actually makes me a hopeless case. And the fact that I know that but haven't done anything about it makes me even more of a hopeless case.

I just feel that, in all honesty, I could be amazing. Doing whatever I do in the future. But I won't be because of my stupid lack of confidence. Here's me ready to screw up any job interview, uni interview, social gathering that comes my way.

How do I change?

just a spoonful of sugar

2011-11-16T20:16:00.000+11:00

Part four of The Shit Life of Sam is a TREMENDOUSLY hypothetical situation and and any relation to real situations or persons living or dead is very, very, very coincidental.

INT. BEDROOM
Sam is at the computer. Bob walks in.

Sam: Hey, Bob, can you come help me with something?
Bob: Sure Sam! What do you need help with?
Sam: I need help with my Apple Mac
Bob: Well, that's simple! An apple is –
Sam Don't start this again. I need to know how to do this.
Bob: This?
Sam: Yeah this.
Sam explains 'this'.
Bob: Oh, well you have to do that.
Bob explains 'that'.
Sam: I don't quite understand that.
Bob: It's simple, it's that!
Bob explains 'that' again.
Sam: I still don't understand it.
Bob: You don't need to understand it, just do it.
Sam: How can I do it if I don't get it?
Bob: You don't NEED to get it, just do IT.
Sam: Explain it to me properly first!
Bob: JUST DO IT!
Sam: Oh, SHUT UP and explain it properly!
Bob: How dare you.
Sam: What?
Bob: Don't be so disrespectful and rude.
Sam: I wasn't. You were yelling at ME, I'm asking for explanation!
Bob: He was rude, wasn't he Sally?
Sally: Yeah you were really rude Sam.
Sam: I didn't understand how to do it and you're having a go at me?
Bob: He thinks he knows everything!
Sam: No, I know not a thing about how to do that! Why I asked!
Bob: Fine, I guess I'm just a horrible friend.
Sally: You've upset Bob now, Sam.
Sam: I don't get it! I just wanted to know what I was doing before I did it!
Sally: You should have just done what he said.
Sam: BUT I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND.
Sally: No excuse.
Sam: If someone told you to jump off a cliff, would you just do it?
Sally: No. But you still insulted Bob.
Sam: But I was asking for explanation before doing something!
Sally: Go and apologise to Bob. He's crying.
Sam: But... BUT.... ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Sam cracks and blows up the moon, leading to the oceans of the world becoming unbalanced and creating killer tsunamis (or whatever happens when the moon blows up), in anger at how stupid every situation in his life is.

End credits.

Apart from the argument I just had with Dad over nothing which was not related to the script above at all. And apart from the $300 fine I may or may not have just paid for after one feet-and-seat-related incident on a train that was my fault, and a student-ticket-related incident that wasn't my fault. And apart from the crappy weather, I had a pretty good day.

Mary Poppins with Jen, Robert and Morgan. Lovely friends, lovely show, amazing sets and organisation on stage. Dragged on a bit at some stages, but it brought back awesome memories from my childhood! There was so much talent in both acting, and how they made all the sets and such function. So clever.

But three hundred dollars in fines?! I don't even have a job. That sucks balls. Oh well, no one gets Christmas presents this year. Too bad. Screw you ShittyRail!

we laughed and laughed

2011-11-16T02:03:00.000+11:00

Dear everyone,

I've had the most enjoyable birthday weekend. If there was one event I was especially looking forward to from this year, it was definitely having a great night with amazing friends, knowing that I was now an adult, and knowing that my exams were all over.

On the 11th day of the 11th month of 2011, I celebrated my 18th birthday, and had an amazing party. Well, I thought it was pretty amazing. It was the best level of chilling, with excitement and everything. I was concerned about my parents dealing with an 18th party, but it seemed to go really well.

I got to see so many people I missed and hadn't seen for ages, and it was nice to just relax with a whole group of people I know and love. Although, it does suck a little, being the host. It's very difficult to get around to everyone and socialise and whatnot, but I hope no one felt neglected by me.

I had a Photo Booth thing happening, and also a Video Booth and all the photos and videos are just far too funny and sentimental that they made me cry tears of joy and I can't stop smiling every time I watch them. Yes, Jake, even the video of Alex's ass, as cringe-worthy as it is.

Hey Frisco even performed on the night, in one of our better gigs as everyone seemed to be getting into it and the audience asked for songs and we were able to supply the demand. It was brilliant, and I'm glad some people who hadn't seen us perform yet, go to see us!

We attempted to do the cake at 11:11pm, but everyone disagreed with Dad's iPad's time and so I kind of did my cake around about-ish that time. But I didn't blow out any candles because they were sparklers shaped as '1' and '8', and they both went off at different times and well, it was all very confusing.

The cake even had the same image as the huge, huge poster Dad had printed out of 'Seán's ascent', which was a little embarrassing and mostly because of the choice of font, but mostly awesome.

The party died around 1.30, and Lauren insisted on cleaning when she left with Josh at 2. Poor Jamie was a little out of it and slept here the night, while I sat up till 3 opening all my presents and reading the cards.

The next day involved lots of cleaning, but ended with a trip to the Catholic Club (the Catho, or the CC) with Aneesa, Louise, Jason, Travis and Shaun. I had to show ID to get in, but every drink I bought following this, I was never asked which disappointed me in one way, but also made me feel old and manly enough not to be asked.

Well, as manly as one can be drinking Midori Illusions. It's okay, I got a Bourbon and Coke later along with chips when Morgan and Marnie joined us after a short trip to see to Fisher's Ghost fireworks display. I also took a photo with beers to make me look more manly.

Soon the party parted, leaving Morgan, Marnie and I to be confused as to how anyone could be addicted to something as tedious and boring as the pokies. Then we were picked up by Jake and Billy, and I ended up going to bed at 4am, after a chill session in the early hours of the morning at Morgan's.

I also had my Dad's side of the family over on the Sunday, and it was good to catch up with them. My uncle's Harley motorbike sure left the neighbours both concerned and deafened upon his departure.

What a great way to end an amazing birthday weekend. Since then I have also had a lovely afternoon tea with Kenney and Aneesa, which included all sorts of brilliance from cupcakes to cucumber sandwiches, from chocolates to scones all prepared by Kenney. And I have also chilled with Morgan, going in the pool for the first time this season!

Thank you to all those who wished me happy birthday, were with me on my birthday, my party or have been generally amazing friends. I love you all and that weekend just made me want to smile forever. Onwards in life and all things awesome!

Love from Seán.

bitches love legal

2011-11-11T13:36:00.000+11:00

It's the 11th of the 11th 2011! And do you know what that means? No, not that it's a palindromic number*. No, not that I can now use words like 'bitches' in my blog post titles. But that it is my birthday. Yes. YES. I know! I'm 18 now. Eighteen. EIGHT. TEEN. Twelve? No no no, EIGHTEEN!

And tonight we shall party! And we shall party well! Well, at least I will. This has got to be the most epic birthday. Not just because of the date, but because I feel like I've completed a step in my life.

I've moved on from being an official 'child' to being an 'official' adult, and I've finished my Higher School Certificate examinations. And I have finished high school. In fact, I signed out of highschool yesterday.

Morgan, Jess, Marnie and I walked around the school, getting our forms signed, and having wacky conversations with the overly-enthusiastic teachers, who were extremely excited to see us. I can't lie when I say I was excited too. I miss most of my teachers. I seemed to have gotten a good set, and it was lovely to see them all again. So lovely in fact, I had to return to the English staffroom minutes after leaving ... mainly because I left my books behind.

We also got references from the school, which also had lots of mistakes in them. But that's the memory that our high school is leaving us with – always something not quite right. Not that I'm complaining. In fact, I'd be disappointed if the reference was all correct.

So I have completed high school completely. 100%. And now I have turned 18. And now I am awaiting my birthday party.

I think this may be the first year I was still awake when the time clocked over to 12, so I was able to celebrate turning 18 sitting in front of my computer at midnight, watching my phone receive so many birthday texts like it was an epileptic at a rave.

I didn't even do that much upon turning 18. Think I read 'The Fry Chronicles', brushed my teeth, went to bed. And I didn't feel any older. There was no sudden Wow I'm Eighteen moment. Although I did question when I had gotten so tall I could only see half my face in the mirror. But I suppose you just realise these things when you're focusing on the fact you're older.

In preparing the house for the party today, I stopped to make a video documenting 11:11 happening on the 11th of the 11th 2011, just for fun and to cure my boredom. It is now my first official proper Youtube video on my new account which I hope to make lots and lots of videos for very shortly.

Party time is coming.
I'M EIGHTEEN!

*I'm talking about you, Qiu! Haha!

super inappropriate

2011-11-08T12:53:00.000+11:00

Despite the HSC being a 'study period', far too many events took place that I really think I should let you catch up on. 'So what have I missed?' I am very glad you asked!

• I was accepted into Early Entry for the course I originally wanted to do, so now I have more options
• I applied for the Dean scholarship at Wollongong Uni, so here's hoping for a 93 ATAR
• Went to Kate and Emma's 18th party where Hey Frisco performed

• I went on a picnic with Kenney and gang, involving boating, cheesecaking and stick wars
• I made a new, way better tasting cheesecake that would make Donna Hay blush, gawd bless her

• I went to Spurs with Angus and Casey the weekend before exams started for a catch up
• I went to Rashays with Nat, James, Jen, Robert, Val, Morgan and saw The Thing which is a thing

• Kenney and I's play As Long as its Natural, or The Pretty House, got through to the finals in a comp
• I wrote four sets of lyrics for songs for Hey Frisco
• I made a music video of an original song 'Astray' with Hey Frisco

• Bought the Australian edition of The Wombats new album to mourn the fact I wasn't going to the concert
• Steve Jobs sadly died
• Chilled with Marnie, Morgan, Sarah, Lauren, Josh and Jess (Telisa for a bit) and scared Sarah really badly
• We scared Sarah again a second night later on, and crashed Courtenay's party for a wee bit
• I made a trailer to advertise the Year 12 Graduation DVD using iMovie's automatic trailer thing

• I BOUGHT MY FREAKING AMAZING VIDEO CAMERA! It's like sex in a HD lens

• Had Marnie's 18th birthday party where Hey Frisco played again, and it was a great night

• Went for that 30 kilometre hike for the third time, and we did better than usual but Louise forgot her keys

• Had a mad chill session with people at mine and Natalie started freaking out at one stage
• Went to Wattamulla with Morgan, Marnie, Lauren, Josh and Jess – it was great day out!

So you feel like you're back on track with my life story now? Because I certainly do. Onwards with the next four months of adventures!

the beginning

2011-11-03T23:47:00.000+11:00

Oh hello there! How have you been?

I know, I know, its been a while since a non-exam related post. Well, this is sort of an exam-related post. Because today, at 4pm I officially finished the HSC.

What do you mean 'what's the HSC?' Where have you been living?! You know those exams I never shut up about? The ones that I've been working so hard for two years for?

No? You clearly haven't been reading my blog then, because ever since the beginning of this back in 2009, all I've had to talk about is school and fear in the lead up to those 'big exams' which ultimately weren't as 'big' as everyone made them out to be this whole time!

Today was November 3rd. That day that I've been waiting on for so long, counting down since the beginning of Year 12 this time last year, and officially counting down from the end of July, as you can see from my big calendar thing I had up in my room!

In fact, I feel the study time was quite relaxing in comparison to the rest of my year. I would have to say this year wasn't fun most of the time. There was so much stress and so much pressure, but when it comes to this day, and you can feel all the hard work and stress pay off, knowing it's all over and you've done your best.

However, the study period is nothing compared to how I am feeling right now. Mum picked me up from school and we had a mini party at home with sweets, and Kenney who arrived with a perfect cheesecake. Then I went out to the shops with Morgan, Jess, Marnie, Shaun, Josh and Lauren and it just felt ... different.

Rather than thinking what I normally do, which is that I'll have to get home at some stage, back to my bedroom, where my floor is covered in books, the bookshelf is full of work to do, there are subjects to study... instead of all this, I had nothing to concern myself about.

It almost makes me feel empty. There was nothing I was avoiding doing, nothing coming up that I was prepared to get stressed for. I am sitting here writing this without feeling like I should be doing something else.

I'm not even procrastinating because I can't. I can't procrastinate!

And it is wonderful. There are parties coming up for the next couple of weeks, I can plan to go out places with people, I'm turning 18 in about a week, I have the most amazing friends in the whole world, and I am just really happy at the moment.

I'm relaxed for the first time this year.

And this whole year, I told myself that because I had exams, I couldn't do this, I couldn't do that. All these excuses, all these things I wasn't able to do. But now I can. I have a huge pile of books to read, movies to watch, films to plan, Youtube accounts to make, parties to attend, projects to continue!

So much, so much. Ultimately, this is the beginning of my year.
Welcome to 2011!

this class hasn't changed

2011-11-02T00:09:00.001+11:00

Modern History.

I'd be lying if I said I was looking forward to this exam. Or prepared for it. Or confident about it.

And let's be honest, you'd be lying to yourself if you were interested in what I had to say about it. Exams are pretty boring after all. Especially three hour ones. So I'll try to make this short. I promise more exciting posts will be visiting your computer screens by next week!

My goal is actually to not mention school virtually at all, because that's what this year became. Me talking about it, and being concerned about it. You don't want to hear that. You want to hear excitement! It's all coming soon, my friends.

But, I will talk about the exam for now. I think it wasn't as bad as I was expecting. I did wake up more than half an hour before the exam this time, but felt more sleepy strangely enough. Even in this semi-delusional state, I was able to produce alright responses in the exam.

I ended up looking like this during reading time.

WWI topic? Nailed that bastard. If we continue with the 'nailing' thing and change it from a colloquialism to a metaphor, I was the high quality rubber mallet hammering against that question. But that also sounds strangely sexual, so I'm going to stop the metaphor thing.

Germany topic? Dear God. I was freaking out about not knowing if I was writing about the right thing. Turns out I was. Didn't write with specific detail though.

Leni Riefenstahl? Halfway through I forgot the name of her most famous Nazi film. Triumph of the Will! Was racking my brains for a wasted 5 minutes. Also, wrote far too much about her, because all this random and specific information kept coming to me.

Conflict in Europe? Don't even... I don't want to talk about it. It was a horrible experience, when you're trying to write about the liberation of France and you can't remember anything about it being liberated. Fail essay.

Also, today I broke my school shoes on the way to school! Halfway through my journey, the inside of my shoe broke and it kept stabbing me in the back of the foot. Scraped skin off. I limped into the library for the exam.

Did the exam barefooted! The exam ladies know about it now too, so I might just not bother putting shoes on for my last one. It was more comfy anyhow.

6 exams down, 1 to go.
THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: This week is freedom! 2 days!

the enemy within

2011-10-31T12:35:00.001+11:00

Extension English 1.

[Email from Sean to Mrs C]

Hello! Be prepared for the essay-length email that follows.

Okayokayokay so I know I didn't email you during the study period. Don't hit me please!

But I just got caught up in the studying and stuff and didn't really get around to it properly. However, I did write up all my quotes on those yellow posters and I did work out your Windings thing (which actually was surprisingly fun) and I did add extensively to my notes from the Trials paper and I made sure I knew all techniques, paradigms, personal context, historical context and so on.

Sorry. But trust me when I say I was prepared.

So. The exam today! You've probably seen the paper by now. Happy with it? Because I was!

It was really straightforward and I was very pleased with it.For the creative writing, I used my Fletcher Brown story and twisted it to be first person view of his grandfather and it worked really well! I made the 'enemy within' part being that the enemy isn't the 'darkness' they are fighting against, but their government for sending off troops pointlessly.

Lovely 6 pages for that too. And it did take me 55 minutes though, so I only had an hour for the essay, but that's okay anyhow.

With the essay, simple! I was concerned about having to involve the paradigms because along with techniques, themes, characters, context, blah, blah, structuring essays could get complicated. However, having paradigms as part of the question made it so much easier.

And it was personal and political! PERSONAL AND POLITICAL! The best ones.

Said that 'Hiroshima' critiqued personal values of readers, specifically in America at the time, by showing the personal values of the interviewees within it. Also used the addition of the last chapter and the contrast between the characters and the facts on the development of bombs to show how there was a political message too.

For 'Catch 22', I focused on how Heller used his personal experiences and the personal stories of characters to create mostly political messages. It asked for two prescribed texts, but I name-dropped Plath. And used 'When the Wind Blows' and 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' for related.

The only downside was the fact that my conclusion could have been a little longer. But I finished it!! 8 pages for this one.

So now that I've finished raving, I'll let you go. You'd think I'd be sick of writing this stuff, right?

Talk to you later,
Sean.

5 exams down, 2 to go.
THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: This week is freedom! 3 days!

masculine despotism

2011-10-27T20:46:00.000+11:00

Ancient History.

So I had a 5 day gap between my last exam and this one. You would think that I somehow by now would have gotten my act together and studied hard for what is arguably one of my worst subjects. But no. No I didn't. I've discovered the wonders of British quiz show Nevermind the Buzzcocks.

I was a bit bipolar for this exam. On one hand, I was freaking out about my apparent lack of content knowledge. On the other, my mark for the Trials wasn't too bad (and that was with one major question left unanswered in it) so I saw myself not being able to fail at all.

And turns out, like it normally does, I went better than I expected to. Pompeii? 'Piss easy!' said Pammy Kay. Sparta? Also pretty easy. Agrippina? Question (a) sucked a lot, but my epic answer to (b) should make up for any losses. Julio Claudians? Easy questions, bit of a crappy answer but decent enough.

Now that all my talk of exams has put you to sleep, I will now impart knowledge onto you about the arrival of my Sketchbook to keep you interested.

So, there's this project called The Sketchbook Project. It sounds pretty neat, so I'm excited to have a go at it! Virtually what you do is buy one of their sketchbooks, with a specific theme to start off on, and just do whatever inside it! Then it gets displayed in the collection on Sketchbooks in Brooklyn, New York, and gets toured around.

I already have a basic idea of what I am going to do in the sketchbook. Like, what style. What the last page will end on. As for whats in the middle, and how it really ends, it all comes with what I experience in the next three months!

Night off I think.

4 exams down, 3 to go.
THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 1 week till freedom. 1 week!

because he's breakable

2011-10-21T18:05:00.000+11:00

Industrial Technology, Multimedia Technologies.

Yep. My third exam down. Cherry Ripe.

For my trial paper, I legitimately did no study for it. None at all! It was my last exam and I thought, you know what, I'm sick of this exam business, I'm just going to not study.

And, I got like 85% or something didn't I? With no study. So I figured the actual HSC exam would be easier. The saddening reality of this exam is easier to express through the conversation I had with my Multimedia teacher.

Me: But how did I do so well? I didn't study for it!
Sir: You what?!
Me: I mean, I didn't study enough for it...
Sir: Well, let's be honest here.
Me: What's that?
Sir: I'll share a little secret with you.
Me: And that would be?
Sir: The exam is written with intelligence levels in mind.
Me: As in?
Sir: As in, it is based on the intelligence of people who do Industrial Technology.
Me: Which is computer nerds...? So shouldn't it be harder?
Sir: No, Industrial Technology involves woodwork and metalwork too.
Me: Ah.
Sir: So... its easier... so that... OKAY SO WOODWORK PEOPLE ARE DUMBER.
Me: Sheesh, I think the whole class knows the little secret now.
Sir: It's easier so that the woodwork and metalwork students have a better chance.
Me: That's very degrading. Don't you think that's degrading Bob?
Bob the Woodworker: Derhhhuh?

There is also the fact that Trial exams are supposed to be more difficult. So with that in mind, I knew that the exam was going to (hopefully) be a breeze. So I just studied the day before, and the morning of.

And it pretty much was. The first multiple choice question asked what key to press on the keyboard to make an indent in Word.* The choice was between tab, enter, space bar or shift. Yeah. Okay. This is mind-bogglingly easy.

The exam goes for a duration of 1 hour and a half. Everyone else who was there left at least half an hour earlier. I only stayed till the proper time, because I had spent the first hour preparing every answer to every question in detail.

The 2 mark questions? Yes, they had planning next to them. THIS IS HOW MUCH TIME I HAD TO WASTE. Easy. I'm hoping the others all left early because it was easy, not because they gave up.

The last half an hour was me sitting their casually finishing up my 10 mark answer while 3 exam-women-people watched me.

Me: I'm really quite sorry about insulting your intelligence levels early in this blog post.
Bob the Woodworker: Herpadurhh.
Me: Yeah, it was shameful of me, but I'm glad you can find it in your heart to forgive me.
Bob the Woodworker: Durrrperherdurr!
Me: Hahaha, wow Bob, that was one real funny joke.
Bob the Woodworker: Wurrburr?
Me: Yes! Aw, Bob, I think we'll get along swell.
Bob the Woodworker: Hurrr.

3 exams down, 4 to go.
THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 2 weeks till freedom.

*I should point out that Woodwork and Multimedia have different Section I's and II's that are related more to either wood or computers, but Section III is the same I believe.

the birds, the birds!!!

2011-10-19T20:26:00.002+11:00

Advanced English, Paper Two.

So, that's me done for any kind of English exa– no, wait I have Extension English still. Nevertheless (a word I used far too often in my essays) I am very much relieved to have both English papers out of the way now.

So I did have a mini freak out last night – it was 10 and I couldn't remember my quotes and still didn't have a substantial amounts of quotes prepared for one of my topics. But, by some miracle, I woke up early this morning and managed to remember everything I crammed within 2 hours.

Josh and Lauren were also proud to be able to give me a lift to school, something we had never been able to coordinate properly before. As soon as I got to school, I didn't even bother to study further, but whinge instead.

Then it was exam time. I thought I'd be good for the Shakespeare question, turns out this one threw me! They put in the last lines of Hamlet, and everyone left the exam going "I didn't even read that far!". Serves us right.

The History and Memory essay, which I thought I'd do the worst, I did really well. For someone who read about an eighth of the book, I seemed to know alot of quotes, examples and structure. The Comparative Study essay was also pretty neat.

I was always going to be concerned about this exam, but I did much better than I thought I was going to do! So, it may not have been the best exam I've ever done, but I left it feeling satisfied.

Then, after the exam, a group of us went via McDonalds – where we found many HSC students from other schools drowning their sorrows in greasy chips – to go for a picnic around Georges River, I think. Eman freaked out alot about this one bird and soon enough we were all sitting around watching a birdy battle take place over a bunch of fries.

Oh, and Eman fell off the see-saw. Clearly Eman was having a bad day.

2 exams down, 5 to go.
THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 2 weeks till freedom.

nobody in brooklyn

2011-10-18T18:12:00.002+11:00

a) Select one aspect of the visual text and stab yourself in the eye out of annoyance.

Oh hello! Thought I'd blog for a bit, and be somewhat (but not really at all) productive with my time while I procrastinate a little. I think this blog calls for a title...!

Advanced English, Paper One.

Yeah, that'll do.

This morning, the fact that I was doing the HSC totally hit me. My sleeping pattern is so screwed up but I somehow managed to get up for 7.30 today. And then I was just like... not freaking out. It wasn't stress, as I was able to remember all 14 quotes, 2 critical references, all my other techniques and other ones stored in my head that I could use if so needed. And it felt like I had done this all before.

I was instead, just, nervous really. If you think about it, this day is the 'big day' that my whole year was supposed to be for, as will be the case for every other exam.

This was supposed to be the one where everything we had learnt was to go into these essays, stories and short answer responses in this 2 hour period where you were supposed to show how amazing you are.

Well, it was a bit of a anti-climax when I got to school and did the exam. There was the whole seeing everyone again thing and the whole nervous chatter.

But as soon as I got into the exam, it was just the same old thing. I wrote down all my quotes, act and page numbers, in case I forgot them, then started straight on the essay. Mainly because the story question had thrown me already, and the short answers never look appealing.

I did the essay, and think I wrote a great response!
But at the same time, it took me 20 minutes longer than it should have.
I wrote extensively and wrote 9 pages!
But, I had to cut out one of my paragraphs, and missed out on a critical reference.
My story showed an understanding of belonging and involved the stimulus!
But, it wasn't very lengthy and quickly cut to the conclusion.

So with all good things, there were bad things.

To be honest, I just feel sorry for Eilis. Everyone's making fun of her BUT IT'S NOT EASY BEING A NOBODY IN BROOKLYN. SHE HAD MEMORIES TO BELONG TO IN IRELAND AND NOW SHE'S A GHOST. A GHOST. HOW DARE YOU ALL.

Also, thank you Kenney for the lovely HSC Care Package I found at my door, most exciting!

1 exam down, 6 to go.
THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 2 weeks till freedom.

bam beat us

2011-10-03T14:05:00.002+11:00

A bit's happened since I've properly blogged about events and whatnot. Let me try to explain all of it in a nutshell ... which you know won't happen because It's me we're talking about and this will turn into an essay. Yes.

Casey's Birthday Party
Zombies, make up, not fidgeting, Angus and I trying to work out who I looked like with the creepy make up on, Youtubing, girl who thought I was hot, Baileys and Midori equals Shit on the Grass, little kid who wanted to kill the zombies, balloon popping, Kate and her amazing costume, Kate's twin, swimming in the pool, gate crash fail, plans to walk the streets as the living dead, leaving early due to sleep deprivation.

Should have been a goth

Mounties Got Talent
Freaking out for most of the morning, forgetting lyrics, matching shirts with toothbrushes, awkward walking around, sound check, Mum being the parental guardian of about 20 under-18s, wristbands allowing underage drinking, teasing Nathan Foley about picking out a wedgy, Luda Kroitor making an inappropriate joke about Nathan Foley's ass, Ben Robertson being upset I didn't know what vocal group he was from, our performance being pretty damn good, the stupid microphone stand, getting people to clap along, Nathan Foley's crappy comments, chilling with a three piece rap dance group of 12 year olds, Hummingbird and Kingfisher!, not winning, hating on Hi-5.

Screenshot from the audition. Our heat was more pro!

Jake's Birthday Party
Walking with Lauren and Josh, drinks, Corrine's hugs, Sarah coming down from Forster, so many photos!, avoiding certain people, 'School captain! Respect man!', the dancefloor, DJ and lights, Nicest Guy Award instead of Best Hair, 'You the guy who was singing? Wombats? Woo!', Jess' determination, DnM's, finding out people who you used to go to school with are actually cool, being yelled at for being inside apparently 27 times, punch!, walking home, NINJA!, home at 2.

Oh SAH-NAP!

Val's Birthday Party
Morgan watching me quickly eat/get ready/wrap presents, lift from Nat, rushing out to get drinks, Duncan's confusing ute, people thinking I'm a party animal, Val's surprise being surprising before Morgan and I returned, chilling with my peeps, Jess and Marnie turning into children?!, Robert not falling to peer pressure, Sven!, dirty conversations, musical chairs, pear flavoured Swedish cidar being the best thing on the planet, present opening, James swears he's not drunk, the video messages to Val, walking home again with Josh and Lauren, Morgan and I getting a lift thanks to Lauren, waiting up for daylight savings so I could watch it turn from 1.59 to 3am.

I've been quite busy and been doing some exciting stuff recently!

And now, I must get more serious with my studying. HSC starts in two weeks from now. I'm sort of freaking out on the inside, but am very lazy on the outside. I need to push myself into more intense studying!

Which is why I am now not going to blog properly for the rest of the month. Oh, I know, don't cry, I know you're all going to die from having nothing to read. I'm only going to blog about how I felt about each exam after I do them, so there will be a little something to read on here eventually. If not, I will see you properly on November 3rd!

Au revoir!

a close shave

2011-09-27T21:08:00.000+10:00

or, 'when the carpentum's rocking', or even 'my shoes are wet'. Far too many in-jokes are made at Ancient and Modern study sessions and they can't all be used for post titles, sadly.

Hello. This blog post is not really intended for you, but feel free to read it if you want. It'll be pretty long and boring though. This is actually going to help me get all this university crazy stuff sorted and clarified in my head because at the moment it is very extremely quite confusing.

So. At the moment I have these things to finish applying for:
• The UAC thing (yes, I know, I still haven't finished it)
• UOW Scholarships (which I can now fill in the details for)
• UTS Scholarships (which I can only do after UAC is in)

And, the two most important courses I have applied for Early Entry with at UOW were:
• Bachelor of Digital Media
• Bachelor of Communication and Media Studies

The Digital Media one sounded the best to me. It is at the Innovation Campus, 3 years, only ATAR of 70 required, all about filmmaking and that, has a TAFE element. It covers a range of topics so it doesn't get specific, which is good for me as I don't know what exactly I'm into yet.

The Communication and Media Studies one isn't as great. It is pretty good, as it also covers a range of topics. Only these topics are more about journalism and international studies. However, there is a digital media major also, but I get the feeling it is not a in-depth as the above degree. And there is a marketing and advertising major that could be interesting too.

So. I was Digital Media all the way! Then... I got replies back about Early Entry.

The Faculty of Art at UOW has given me early entry for Communication and Media Studies! Also, I was sent a letter that was personally addressed to me, saying that they had been requested by those who had gone through all the early entry applications, to encourage me to go for a Dean's scholarship.

A Dean's scholarship would mean that I could fast-track my studies. I could ultimately finish my course earlier than the 3 years! I get my own office. I get $500 for textbooks. I could get into jobs younger than most others, and the prestige that comes with a Dean scholarship is quite good.

But first, I have to get it! To get it, I have to get an ATAR over 93. To keep it, I have to get distinctions most of the time during my studies. I also would have a bigger workload.

BUT, Digital Media, the one I wanted first, I didn't get any offers for. Apparently offers can come as late as halfway through October, but also I think it required an interview for its Early Entry, and that contact should have come through ages ago.

So at the moment I assume I don't have Early Entry for that one.

So my problem is... is my preferences for UAC, do I put Digital Media first, even though there is no early entry, possible scholarship, ATAR 70; or do I put Communication Media Studies, with early entry, possible Dean's scholarship, ATAR 93?

I feel I should do the Dean's one. But am I as interested in it? Argh!

But then, is this really relevant right now? You can change your preferences in UAC until January. If I don't like the course, I can always change to Digital Media perhaps. If I don't get the scholarship, I'm still guaranteed a position because I got early entry.

The point is, things can be changed to how I want whenever and such. Doesn't really matter at the moment. What matters at the moment is applying for scholarships and posting in my UAC thing.

And I figure, I should leave the Communication degree as my first option. It's not everyday you get these opportunities. I would rather take this opportunity even if I hated it later, then reject it, do the other course, and find I would have liked the other course. Make sense?

I think I've justified my decisions. First I was complaining about getting no opportunities, then they threw a bajillion at me. But it's all good. Very complicated. But good.

sleep imagine stuff

2011-09-27T21:03:00.000+10:00

I'm trying to catch up on everything! Now, last Thursday. Last Thursday was a very very very busy day. Thought I'd tell you about it and stuff. Cool? Cool.

So this whole year of school I haven't been able to get up at normal time. No matter if I had to be at school at 8 in the morning on Tuesdays and Thursdays for Extension History, or even at Multimedia by 9.58, I just could never get there on time. Yeah, our school has stupid bell times. Like for real. 9.58. That's a bell time!

Despite this, and my lack of sleep, on the morning of graduation I woke up at 6. SIX IN THE MORNING. I spent the morning writing essays inside thank you cards for teachers and wrapping their gifts up.

Then, about 7, everyone was up! Ties, ironing, blazers, final wrapping, facebooking, texting. And then by 8.30 we were travelling to school.

The assembly was so very lovely. Kenney came to see me graduate at short notice, and I suppose he got to watch me sit on stage looking really bored for most of it. Jen and I only had to do our farewell speeches which we finished the day before. I was surprisingly nervous, even when walking into the assembly accompanied by 'The Final Countdown' by Europe.

Our speeches were a hit though. Although we missed our queue to leave the stage after handing the new school captains' their sunglasses, we managed to sit with Year 12 as we watched Jess and I's video which was a BIG hit.

After I received my report and the principal hugged me in the most awkward way possible, I left the hall and couldn't find most of my friends, and then kept getting stopped to take photos with people.

I eventually went around to give my presents to all the teachers and it was all very happy and huggy. Then I went off to Pancakes with the family and Kenney, Emily and William.

Then, I was home. Got distracted. Got prepared and packed within half an hour before I had to get to Morgan's. Morgans' parents drove us into the city. We stayed at the Meriton on Kent Street.

Here – and I kid you not – Morgan and I ran around the three storey penthouse apartment like little kids. We were so excited. We got lost at first, it was that big a place! And Marnie was sure happy to hear us screaming to her on the other end of the phone.

We had two balconies! The closed in one, and a huge one that went around the top level for metres. We took great photos up there with the sunset behind us. It was such a great view from the 56th floor. We had four bathrooms, two kitchen type areas, far too many TVs that weren't used at all, a spa and the comfiest beds ever. We even had an espresso machine, although I was too scared I'd break it.

Everyone got to the apartment eventually, I made sure I got the main bedroom with the ensuite and the sex mirror on the ceiling above the bed. I got into my suit. Morgan did my hair all sexy. The girls got all ready. Eman complained about being too black.

We got taxis to the wharf, found the right wharf, not the one with the other school's formal on it, and took photos, and boarded our cool-as ship.

The cruise was for four hours, though it felt so much longer inbetween the talking, dancing, laughing. It was so enjoyable. The food wasn't great, but my friends are amazing and they made the night. It was not long before out beautiful views of the harbour were gone and we were making our way back to the penthouse.

We had many people come back to ours, and the security guard came into the apartment and kind of went "We've had a complaint of noise coming fro– Wow. There is a lot of people in here." He almost sounded impressed. He kindly told us that guests weren't allowed after a certain time, so lots of people left the seven of us to chill all the way until 4 in the morning when Morgan and I crashed and Jess and Marnie stayed up.

It was the best night! So much fun! The next morning we got up, stopped for a moment at Hungry Jacks, got the train home, and I spent the day relaxing and catching up on sleep.

I have finished school. Weird.

finishing up

2011-09-25T19:05:00.001+10:00

My last regular Tuesday assembly was on the 6th September. I sat down on that horribly dusty hall floor and made bitchy comments and funny observations about the assembly with Marnie, Emma, James and Frankie. I made a great joke about a tall person, and it was so funny some random person sitting a metre away burst into laughter.

My last Modern study session was on the 7th September. Sir, Jen, Divya and I went through past essay questions and linked them to syllabus dot points. The guy outside was mowing the concrete. He was bored I guess.

My last assignment was completed on 9th September. Rather than feeling bad about procrastinating over it, I took pride in doing so as it was my last assignment and it was a tradition. Of course, this led me to procrastinating till 8pm on the night it was due. Sir accepted it though.

My last Ancient lesson was on the 19th September. We did a little revision to begin. Sir tried to say some nice sentimental things to our class but Melissa kept interrupting. Sir was astounded by the length of her hair. It ended with Jen, Amie and Mel attacking sir with silly string and then we took a class photo after an attempt at cleaning up.

My last proper English lesson was on the 19th also. We had a class party with plenty of pizza. The award surveys were passed around and we filled them out while we chilled. It was nice to just sit back and not worry about school work.

My last Extension History lesson was on the 20th September. It was Mrs Ellis and I, as Amie was not there. Mrs Ellis' niece however was there and we went through the lesson working out how to answer a past essay question.

My last PBIS lesson was on the 20th. It was a 'Can of Worms' type question thing that Emma and I got really into, seeing as we were never going to do this ever again.

My last Multimedia lesson was on the 20th also. The lesson was supposed to be full of writing extended responses, but we all got very side-tracked.

My last free period was on the 20th September, 4th period. I spent it with the Economics class eating chocolate and taking photos for them.

My last TAFE day was on the 20th also. I had to finish up one artwork that was left outstanding, but once that was done I had finished all my course work and sat back, listening to Lyn talk about her cracked neighbours.

My last mufti day was the supposed to be the 21st September, but I didn't wear mufti, and most others didn't as we wanted to wear our uniform on our last day of school.

My last morning meeting with the Morning Club Club was on the 21st September. Jen gave out these amazing bags, which are a HSC Survival Guide. Frankie, James and I also attempted to create MC Club title sequences.

My last roll call was on the 21st September. I was with Marnie and we just sat there in bewilderment at the fact it was our last day.

My last Modern lesson was on the 21st September. We did the final content revision and then Mr Levkovski attempted his sentimental speech again, only to be interrupted by Sarah this time. Then it was time to eat food and lots of it. I tried to get people to play dead soldiers. There was a water fight.

My last Extension English lesson – and last lesson ever – was on the 21st September at 1pm. Jen and I didn't really learn, but ate lots of food and enjoyed each other's company. And I heard the cleaners use their vacuum cleaners for the first time! They always get out those vacuums but never use them!

My last time on stage was the 22nd September. This was the Year 12 Graduation assembly. Jen and I sat on stage for part of it, to do our farewell speech. Then we left the stage for the last time.

My last video that I made for the school premiered at the assembly, showing interviews with students, teachers, photos, and funny segments. People laughed alot and it made me happy to have created something so good

My last role as school captain was cutting the cake with Jen on board our ship for the formal. Koosache did some dodgy speech, we abused him and cut the cake in a crappy way.

All these lasts! So much I'm going to miss. Yet, so much to look forward to now also!

the end

2011-09-21T22:50:00.002+10:00

Just like that, it was the beginning of the day. The beginning of my last day of school.

There was the last ever MC Club which had a newly created title sequence by Frankie and I.
There was my enthusiastic hugging of all the people I love. I didn't want to let go.
There was Morgan and I's usual abuse of each other, both physically and verbally.
There was the double period taken up by the assembly rehearsals.
There was Koosache's words to us about how our lives are about to begin.
There was the failure at walking in and out of a building in alphabetical order.
There was the re-watching of the Year 10 Graduation video that brought back the memories.
There was all the lovely comments written on Jen's shirt.
There was the quick rush to finish our speech in Ms Duval's office.
There was also the busy and exciting mini-party occurring in this same office at lunch.
There was Ms Duval's pinky-finger action that we all mimicked.
There was my drinking of a large amount of strawberry milk because no one got me a glass.

There was the escape from school down to Woolworths to purchase tea.
There was the screaming out the car window and the use of more silly string by Amie.
There was the attendance to Modern History that day, for a class party.
There was a strange feeling in that classroom, one that unnerved me.
There was not a feeling of finality or happiness, it was... difficult to describe.
There was Sarah's usual antics to annoy sir – this time with a horn.
There was a water fight which I made sure I was not involved in.
There was the bell. Everyone cheered and left Jen and I to attend Extension English.
There was the listening to Sarah's car scream past while in A10.
There was the lovely presents from Mrs Cremer which made me almost cry.
There was all that food that we didn't get through any of!
There was the recalling of all the things that had happened in the last six years.

There was the goodbyes and the goodlucks.
There was the walking down the A block corridor.
There was only the sound of our footsteps and our conversation.
There was the sun streaming in through the window at the end of the block.
There was the tight hug confirming my sadness for leaving.
There was Jen and I parting ways at the end of the block for the last time.

And just like that,
it was the end.

spontaneous headbutting

2011-09-20T22:31:00.002+10:00

I had my last Extension History morning today. Amie was off getting a tan, so I was left to the wise words of the old Ellis and her giggling niece. It felt sudden, and harsh and abrupt. The lesson that is, not the niece's giggle.

It didn't feel like a final lesson at all. It just felt like another lesson. Just another day. So weird. And then I had my last PBIS lesson ever, which gave Emma and I enough to whinge about as usual, as we always believe our opinions are correct – and thankfully share the same views. Yet again, it was just another lesson.

Emma and I were wondering why no one else was answering in class. Because they are all going to have to do this again. It was our last one ever though. But it was just an average PBIS lesson.

Modern was ordinary too. We went through revision, Sarah was disrupting, we all did the usual blank faces and sir called us 'dumbasses' like normal.

Multimedia was pretty laid back. Frankie and I failed to do our extended responses, instead resorting to watching sir's talent of ballroom dancing on his phone. Sir was slightly concerned that I wanted to know how difficult it was to dance in heels.

I had a free period, but joined the Economics class to the surprise of sir. I ate too much chocolate and generally enjoyed sitting back and watching the class enjoy their last period of Economics. They were such a fun, united class, I felt.

Then I slipped away from English to go to TAFE in a very difficult and miscommunicational way. Jess and I went to the train station because Morgan was going to be late with Marnie and Eman, but then they ended up picking us up from the station to go to Morgan's so that we could drive to TAFE.

We eventually got there. For our last TAFE lesson ever. I had to do a quick piece of art up that was long overdue to complete the course. Then we made Lyn a card and relaxed.

We then went to dinner afterwards all of us. Morgan, Jess, Corrine, Carina, Rachel, Nathan and I. It was Nathan's birthday and the waiter at Rashay's had no problem with us singing loudly as his cake came out.

And then on the way home, I felt an empty feeling. I knew I would see them all again, but I had still left TAFE and that class behind and all those Tuesdays behind and I felt sad. And then I thought about how this is exactly how I'm going to feel about school in the next two days.

I have my last proper day of school tomorrow. Hm.

nominated for best hair

2011-09-19T20:41:00.000+10:00

(Male Category)

In case I win, I have already written my acceptance speech. And it goes as follows:

Oh thank you, thank you, no, no you shouldn't have. I already know my hair is amazing! This is an honour! I can't believe it. Oh, let me wipe these tears of joy out of my eyes before I continue.

My competition sits next to me

I'd like to thank first and foremost, myself for the time and dedication I put into my hair. I woke up late this morning seeing as I had a free period first, and did absolutely nothing all morning. My bed hair was sure an achievement to maintain and about 6 hours sleep was put into making it the way it is.

I got into school eventually, and at first I thought the weird faint feeling I had was to do with the fact that it sunk in that I only had 3 days left of school, but now I think it must have been to do with knowing my hair was that amazing.

So today I had Multimedia first. And I got there on time! Sir was very impressed with the fact I was actually attending school this week. Frankie and I attempted to write extended response questions, but that clearly didn't happen as everyone got distracted.

Click for larger

Then it was recess, where I felt like I reunited with everyone after having seen everyone on and off for the past week. It was a very cheerful recess, as was lunch also.

But first, I had to go through Modern and Ancient where we recapped on content. In Ancient, Mr L was attacked by Jen, Mel and Amie with silly string. Morgan had a spray can of it on her by chance, so I joined in on the fun until he was completely covered in smelly stringy gooeyness. A great deal of cleaning up was in order. Thank god my hair didn't get ruined in the process.

After lunch, I had a lovely free period with Jess, Lauren and Jamie where we whispered everything in the room upstairs in the library while a Year 11 exam was on. It was fun to just sit around and relax for once.

Then English was last period. The survey forms were handed out to vote for those who were nominated. And I realised that I had been nominated for best hair! Oh, how proud I was that moment. And how proud I am now to be the winner. James can go get stuffed with his silly hair that is three different colours. MINES MALLEABLE BITCH.

If I hadn't gotten nominated for anything I would have burst into tears like a blonde bimbo. Good thing I didn't. So I thank you all. So much. SO SO MUCH. Oh, I'm going to cry now... can't .... speak.... so.... happy....

Yeah. So what do you think? I don't think its too over the top. Might need to put it up a notch. More crying and stuff.

And that was my last Monday of school ever.

Graduating in 3 days.
THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 6 weeks till freedom.

my three elder sisters

2011-09-18T14:26:00.000+10:00

It was nice to have another eventful weekend that was not full of stressing and procrastinating over school as I always am. Instead, it felt like a well-deserved break to go do things.

And by things, I mean get driven to the shops by Nat with Jen and meeting up with Robert and Val later on to do some intense shopping. Oh yes! This was not going to be an ordinary shopping trip. This was going to be an intense one! Hence... why I called it 'intense shopping'. Jesus. Keep up.

We had to buy gifts for our Year Advisers to be presented at our Graduation Assembly, and get them engraved also. Natalie also had to buy presents for her other teachers. I had the aim of buying – no joke – 6 people birthday presents. One of these was a joint gift with Natalie. Robert was searching for a tie and shoes to match Jen's dress for the formal. Val was ... actually, I'm not sure exactly. But she was there for part of it anyhow.

There's no need to go into detail. There was just a lot of walking and coordinating and mathematics and talking and decisions and stuff that we went through. It was very tiring.

But we found A TIE FOR ROBERT! You do not know how many stores we went into before we found one he liked. He needed a specific blue to go with Jen's dress, but everything we saw with that colour was an ugly pattern. Or too purpley. Or too blue. Or too light. Or too dark.

Eventually, we found Oxy Wear, and even though we had to put up with the rude sales assistant, we did indeed find him the perfect tie and it is the correct colour, and plain and fine. Best win that day.

Then I got home at some stage, and I had band practice, and I think we decided on a song to do for our heat at Mounties Got Talent, and then at some stage Natalie and James turned up again and had to wait for me to get ready so we could off to Lauren's party.

Which was a lovely party! Everyone was so laid back, just chilling and enjoying each other's company. There was a pool game going at one stage where I almost got to the end. And there was plenty of photo-taking, dart-throwing, abuse-yelling and laughing going on.

I hope Lauren enjoyed her birthday party. Happy birthday Lauren!

Nat, Val and I eventually walked back to mine to crash in the loungeroom.

And now it's Sunday. I have a million things to do, but you know what, they can wait, because I need to relax a bit and go through all this stupid work slowly. It'll be finished eventually, but this week coming up won't be full of schoolwork, it's going to be full of mucking around, cheeriness, sadness, leaving, hugging, crying.

Emotional Week up next! Stay tuned!

got talent?

2011-09-15T19:37:00.000+10:00

You know that talent thing I went to on the night I went to see Dylan Moran and then I got into it and then it was really exciting to think the band managed to get into it with me singing?

WELL. Here are the proper definite details for my band's performance for our heat of Mounties Got Talent! So I think everyone should come along and vote ... or even have a good laugh at me being on stage looking majorly awkward.

click for larger

If that's not enough for you, the three judges are Nathan Foley, who used to be in Hi-5, Luda Kroitor... who apparently was on Dancing with the Stars, and some other guy.

It's on the 29th September at Mounties' Showroom, in Mt Pritchard. Tickets $6.

Hooray. There we go. Spruiking done.

So I went to school Wednesday to see if I could gain anything from it. Turns out I couldn't. I rocked up a bit late to Multimedia and sir didn't really care, but then I spent the period just studying my notes... like I could have done at home.

So then I had Ancient. Well, was supposed to. Instead I helped Natalie with painting the Year 12 'square', while sir got in trouble for telling a student that he's "sick of your crap!" since both the principal and deputy principal were standing behind him.

This, of course, did not hinder his actions in hitting me across the head twice that day. Clearly he was in a loving mood.

Then, I had a free period ... like I had already had that morning. This one was instead taken up partly by the principal pretty much destroying all plans for a Year 12 'fun day' within seconds. It was like watching Power Rangers. There's all this build up at the very beginning, then BAM! all of sudden there's a giant evil person stamping on a city.

That was abstract. I'll try to tone it down a little next time. But after all this stress and planning for the day, and it's washed down the drain within seconds. See? That was a little better right?

In Extension English we watched a film from the 80s. Although traumatic, it was nowhere near as frightful or mentally damaging as some things we have seen in this class. Why we chose After the Bomb as our topic, I'll never know.

Actually, I do. It's very interesting.

SO today, I woke up late and figured, there's no point going through the painful rigmarole of late notes and whatnot, to only go and attend a day full of doing absolutely nothing. So instead I remained home with Kieran, who had a day off from his own Prelim exams, and got more done than I would have if I went into school.

Of course now, I have all this stupid as English work to complete because I haven't done any of the required work for about two terms as miss is not so great and I have just been doing my own thing. Kind of annoyed, as I have the possibility of getting an N-award within the last week of school. Wouldn't that suck?

To add to this extremely long recount, I also today started properly applying for university. On UAC and everything. Very frustrating at first but it soon turned into fun when I aimed to fill up the options. I'm putting Primary Teaching as my very last option, just in case everything else I do falls apart for some reason. But teaching! Oh, how many of my family members I would be making proud.

But no. Still sticking with the digitally media-ey thing.

And... end post.

remember, it can zoom

2011-09-13T23:51:00.001+10:00

Where do I begin with today? It was just so very... happy. Happy is definitely the term I'd use.

After a completely intense day of school-working, and a mind-numblingly boring weekend of attempting to do the sane school work, after a horribly tragic end to school last week, a Sydney Harbour Full Day Cruise with Buffet Lunch, with all expenses paid for, was exactly what I needed.

Although I really wanted to see my TAFE friends, I had to sacrifice that joy to instead eat far too much and laugh even more today. Our prefects sure are unusual characters. Of course, I was there with Jen, Mel, Nat and James so it wasn't like any kind of official outing. It was just friends. And it was lovely.

The train trip in was already exciting, but that was probably more my coffee talking. Having not seen people for a good for three days, I had far too much to say.

We got into Circular Quay about an hour early, so we walked the sea-view pathway to another wharf much further away near Darling Harbour, while we all busily snapped away with our cameras. Sir, Nat and I were certainly Nikon buddies today.

A quick stop at the Aquarium entrance for somewhere to sit, and to be completely amazed by the enormous Lego King Triton, we eventually got onto our ship, one from the Magistic Cruises, which was lovely.

This was the same wharf we'll be getting on our ship for the formal in a week also, so we tried to find our formal ship but with little luck. However, we did find the Meriton Hotel... eventually. After we discovered it wasn't the huge glassy building that Natalie had pointed out, but instead a smaller, further away one. Still looks awesome.

The cruise was nice. We were joined by mostly tourists, and stayed with the huge group of Japanese tourists who were also going on the full day cruise, unlike most other passengers.

My god, the people flocking towards the buffet! It was crazy how greedy people got, as soon as the food was put out – BAM! A queue! Still, we were lucky to be close and were able to line up and stack our plates full.

Soon we were spending the whole day snapping away, chilling and chatting at our table, and every possible spot on the ship. We spent a considerable amount of time right up top, where Melissa kept getting shocked by the horn and jumping into James' lap almost.

James and I also fell overboard and drowned at one stage, but whatever. It's not like Jen and Mel cared... until they found us of course.

Melissa got snap-happy once more with my Nikon, which proved to be helpful in getting some great photos. I'm sure the other tourists wouldn't have been too happy with our constant talking and excitement, but we sure had a great time.

The day ended late with all of us slowly falling asleep or going completely mental in the head and James trying to get out of tutoring. We also managed to reveal to sir all our secrets of 'study days'.

Lovely day with lovely people!

makes you think

2011-09-11T21:33:00.002+10:00

Sure, I'll commemorate 9/11. There was a terrible loss of life, a terrible amount of destruction. And sure, those in Middle East who actually physically ordered, planned and carried out the attack are horrible people.

But when it comes to the 10th anniversary of the attacks, and I'm given these insights into different statistics and information, unusual from the norm, then I really start to question who the bad guys are here. Just look at these.

click for larger

George Bush pretty much summed it up when he called it a 'war on terror'. Yeah. Lovely little oxymoron there. Oxymoron? I think it's an oxymoron. Let's stick with the moron bit at least.

There are innocent casualties on both sides. But, there is also bad on both sides.

Sure, there were those in the Middle East who celebrated the attack. But there was just as many celebrating the death of Osama Bin Ladan. Everyone's screwed up.

To look at this information, it makes me sick to think that there has been so many more innocent deaths in Afghanistan and Iraq. To kill that many more people after so many had died in the initial attack is wrong.

It needs to stop. But there's always got to be some kind of war going on, doesn't there?

I will commemorate 9/11. But not just for the American victims, but all those who were innocently killed from that day onwards in conjunction with the same war.

teddy bear attack

2011-09-11T11:32:00.000+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

What a cool photo right? Two business men... and K and I.

Tuesday 11th September, 2001
On Tuesday, Dad, Kieran and I went to the movies to “Planet of the Apes” while mum went shopping. Then we went on the QANTAS Flight at night to Singapore.

Wednesday 12th September, 2001
On Wednesday evening we got off QANTAS Flights.

Thursday 13th September, 2001
On Thursday we walked around looking for games for gameboy but they were too expensive. But we found a “Shrek” game for gameboy and mum said I could get it for my birthday or Christmas. On Thursday evening we went on QF to AUSTRALIA!

Oh! The final days of our European holiday! Thought I'd post this one on September 11, as it is the tenth anniversary of, as we all know, the day I went to see Planet of the Apes in French. Front page news, this.

During this time, we also visited Sacre Coeur, another cathedral. It was in here that Dad let me video tape a service that was going on and a French man came up to me and started grabbing at me and the camera. It was all a bit distressing as Mum and Dad didn't know what to do and we couldn't understand him.

Turns out he was actually trying to warn us that anyone could come up and steal the video camera off a 7 year old kid, rather than doing what he was warning us of. What a nice man.

Now! I've already written about this before, but the fact I didn't mention anything about the 9/11 attacks in America just reflects how I was too young to be aware of any of this. All I remember is the taxi ride where we found out via the radio what was happening.

And this also reflected upon our experience at the airport, where security was tightened majorly and my teddy bear, Boo Boo, was almost ripped in half because the security guy was suspicious of me. I don't blame him. I look like I could potentially blow up an airport with a teddy bear. And Boo Boo does have a solid part in his body that could have been a Weapon of Mass Destruction.

And while all this madness was going on around us, Dad missed his birthday. Our flight back to Australia, via Singapore once more, meant that we went through time zones of course and the 12th of September was either a very short day, or never existed. Poor Dad.

He got his present on the plane though, and a nice crappy plane dinner too. Actually, I say crappy, but this was the first time I was satisfied with my plane food – we had chips! Hot chips on a plane!

I don't actually recall anything about Singapore on the way back. But I suppose my experience of Singapore melded into one. I did buy a Shrek Gameboy game though. I still have it. I kept a small plastic rose that I got from a Kinder Surprise in France as well. I still have it too! It's weird what you keep.

And it was just so relieving to come home, but also a big let down. Having seen so much, we had returned. Miss Matthews was not at our house when we returned but Katie was. I'd never seen Katie be so hyperactive before in my life! She just ran around the house for a solid hour.

I found LOTS of chocolate wrappers in my bedroom. Silly Miss Matthews. It was so lovely to be home, but at the same time it didn't feel right. I've known this feeling many times. You go from the excitement of travel, to your normal life once more.

I went back to school soon after this. I'd missed out on a lot: my teacher had left pregnant, I had a new teacher, the whole class knew Japanese and I didn't and my postcard I sent to 1/2F had only arrived two days before I had returned ... even though I had sent it right at the beginning of the holidays.

My god, I write so much! Someone needs to tell me shut up. Well, there you have it folks. My European holiday. Hope you enjoyed it.

in checkmate now

2011-09-10T21:21:00.001+10:00

There has recently become a big distinction between those people I like, and those people I don't.

People I don't like are those who I'm forced to be near at school and the like.
Who don't necessarily do big things to piss me off, but little things.
With all these little things building up to turn my annoyances into raging anger.
Who have the guts to complain about things, but don't want to help.
Who actually become an obstacle to others and myself, who are trying to help.
Who can't answer a simple question and always have to give me bullshit.
Who does their usual fake-nice routine to try to win me over.
Who make me not want to go to school because of their stupidness and illogicality.
Who make it really hard for me to think of nice things to say in a graduation speech.

But! People I like are those who don't need to have exciting plans with me.
Who don't mind just sitting and chatting with me.
Who ring up and join us for coffee times two and gets us lost on the way to Picton.
Who cuts my hair for me, because you only live once, and he's surprisingly skilled.
Who text to tell me that he just met up with all my teachers at the strike.
Who hear that I'm feeling down about a situation, and storm off to the library for me.
Who hug me when they know I need one.
Who agree and complain about the things I'm hating on in order to make me laugh.
Who are selfless enough to attempt to fix problems that aren't their own.
Who inbox me continuously throughout the day to keep me entertained.

Haircut by Angus

And now I've spent a whole day not doing enough school work, which I think is well deserved. It isn't really, but I'll just keep lying to myself I guess.

Everything is coming up so soon! Graduation, formal, holidays, exams. I have a Prefect Lunch Sydney Harbour Cruise Thing on Tuesday. It doesn't feel real at the moment. Nothing does. Suppose when it all comes around it'll hit me.

Oh, also! My band totally got into Mounties Got Talent! So, this is me inviting anyone who wants to come see me sing and the others actually be musically talented, at Mounties, at Mt Pritchard on the 29th September. Tickets are $6!

We'll be one of the performances on the night, and you'll have to vote (hopefully for us), as half the choice on if we make it through relies on audience!

Yep. It's almost like a legit copy of Australia's Got Talent. Only with the use of poor grammar!

Graduating in 12 days.
THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 8 weeks till freedom.

day of play

2011-09-10T20:00:00.007+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Sunday 9th September, 2001
On Sunday we went to Notre Dame.

Monday 10th September, 2001
On Monday it was Kieran and my fun day out! All the rides that we did without a ticket were: an Eiffel Tower made out of rope, flying fox, diggers, slipper dip, fire engine, trampoline, speakers. The other ride where we had to give a ticket was: dodgem cars, boat ride, swingers.

Kieran and I of course needed another break from all the museum-ing we had been doing, so we had a fun day doing all that stuff I felt the need to list in my diary. And that is as far as my memory will go with this, I'm afraid.

And, out of all this French stuff, I appear to have forgotten to mention the Arc de Triomphe. So I'll mention it now. I have no idea when we went to see it, but here's a photo anyway.

wrong orders

2011-09-08T13:35:00.008+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Friday 7th September, 2001
On Friday we went to the Eiffel Tower. It was a huge! We went through the garden.

Saturday 8th September, 2001
On Saturday we went to the Louvre. We saw some Egyptian Artefacts. Then we went and saw some paintings (including the Mona Lisa).

France was beautiful. While Mum and Dad had to encourage K and I not to eat the hash cookies on offer in Holland, this time they had to encourage us not to look out the windows on the trains we used for transport, as there were many erotic billboard posters on display.

Now, the Eiffel Tower is just so iconic and so beautiful. We were going to go up the elevator to the top, but of course it was very crowded, so we decided staying down the bottom was fine enough for us. Kieran and I both got treated to the most expensive icecreams ever – 44 francs! Which converted to 11 dollars back then.

I remember lying in the grass, and what I could see was exactly like that photo there, with the tower the trees shading us. While Mum and Dad drank their cafe lattes I drew numerous Eiffel Towers in my notepad.

The Louvre was impressive too. So impressive, I started planning out my own museum floor plans. The glass pyramid is just... wow! I also like the fact I mention "some Eygptian artefacts" before "some paintings (including the Mona Lisa)".

Yeah, no biggie, just seeing one of the most famous paintings ever. But in truth, it was quite disappointing because the painting is so small and behind a huge glass barricade – which is difficult to take a photo through, not even considering the massive crowds that are always in front of it!

Our hotel in France was lovely too. The lady at reception would always correct Mum's pronunciation of bon jour. Along the main street where our hotel came off was a great bakery, and this old bank and post office that had been turned into a restaurant where we ate our second night there.

It was a brilliant restaurant, with the post box things all along the walls. We shared our table with two Scottish girls, who became increasingly frustrated once our meals came out all nice and tasty, while they managed to order hamburgers ... which in France, is a small piece of uncooked meat. Eat up girls!

Dad's schoolboy French managed to get us through, even ordering some really nice desserts!

France was nice. I'd like to go back there one day.

he's mowing the concrete

2011-09-07T20:42:00.000+10:00

Being a complete tool with Photo Booth

It was my normal Wednesday today.

I took the day off to actually get some school work done like I usually do, as school quite ironically* gets in the way of doing school work.

That was nice. I like doing it on Wednesdays, because I have a free period in the morning, so I get marked down as 'school business' for the whole day.

There's a loophole in the system and as usual I went through it again unnoticed. Just as unnoticed as I am when I slip into the school for Extension English at one in the afternoon, in my casual clothing. I'm surprised out of all the times I've done this, not one teacher has questioned me for either not attending the rest of school, or being an 'outsider' whose come into the school.

And then, as usual, Jen and I talked too much, but only after we finished our practice essay which was unusual, and then we didn't get any more work done for class, and we blamed Mrs C's leg cramp for the fact we couldn't stop reminiscing about our time in high school.

Then we both went over to B Block for Modern study where we were distracted by a clearly bored-out-of-his-mind cleaner while pulling apart essay questions, like we always do.

Then we ended up staying back longer than we intended because sir kept talking, like we usually do. But this time it felt more like we just wanted to stay and chat – sir, Jen, Divya and I – because we kept thinking back to years earlier and were starting to realise that we are nearing the end, and didn't want to leave.

Just another regular Wednesday. Not many more of these left to go though.

Graduating in 15 days.
*aye, Jen?

big shoes to fill

2011-09-06T20:00:00.014+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Monday 3rd September, 2001
On Monday we got a bus tour about Holland. First we went to the clog factory where we got told how to make clogs. Next we went to the cheese farm. At the cheese farm we tried some cheese.

Tuesday 4th September, 2001
On Tuesday we went to Van Gogh. All his paintings were pretty good.

Wednesday 5th September, 2001
On Wednesday we went to the park and made a great sandcastle.

Thursday 6th September, 2001
On Thursday we went on the high speed train to France!

We were in Holland. So we weren't not going to do all the stereotypical things you can do in Holland! So, we had to start off with the clogs. We went to a factory which in hindsight, would have been pretty boring. I'd prefer to shoot myself in the foot than watch someone make uncomfortable, wooden shoes for an extended period of time.

The Cheese Farm was more amusing. We got to taste so many different cheeses, which I loved! I also got to see how real cheese is made, with the wax covering and everything. The tour guide also gave out test samples of their milk as well, which I only remember because her teapot was shaped like a cow and the milk came out of its mouth? its udders? Somewhere amusing.

I love this entry too! "On Tuesday we went to Van Gogh. All his paintings were pretty good." How pretentious can I sound?

However, this is the museum where Kieran and I pretended to be art critics, so that statement kind of suits it. Mum told me how when we entered the museum, the security guards were concerned at the fact that there were two kids.

So, we endeavored to prove him to him that we weren't just kids that were going to muck around. Instead, we talked about the deeper meanings behind the artworks and were generally arty geeks, all to impress the security guard.

Apparently we amused him nonetheless.

And then we got the high speed train to France. The train station was amazing but we were warned of dangers on the platform. Lots of people came up to you to beg for loose change, and most of these people also were pickpockets. So we had to remain very careful both here and at the station in France.

What an awesome train though! Speedy! And modern! It was 2001, and this train is still more modern than any trains we have in Sydney. Sadly, I don't even recall that much about the train trip.

on top of the world

2011-09-06T07:34:00.002+10:00

Good morning. I don't normally have time in the morning to write a blog post, but I dragged myself out of bed at 6.30 so that I could finish off the Year 12 Graduation Video, which is now burnt onto DVD.

Will have to check everything is fine with my year advisor, but I'm quite happy with the result at the moment. The only thing I really get concerned about is the photos. Apparently in the Year 10 Graduation Video I did, people wanted the photos to go slower and some people claimed to have missed out in being in them.

I tried to fix this problem of missing people, but if I show the photos for longer the video would go on for ages! But of course, knowing how screwed up my grade is, they'll complain again.

I'll still get complaints about people not being in it, just you wait. And they'll be the ones who never sent me any photos in the first place. Got to love logic!

I had people wanting to email me photos yesterday afternoon in what looked like one big rush. Our grade is unbelievably disorganised. In fact, most plans for our grade are cancelled early on before they're even mentioned for the fact that we know they won't be able to get organised.

So, I've realised I get really obsessive with making films. I just spent a good three days on just editing that video alone, let alone all the filming happening at school in my free periods. I'm glad I've finished it now so I continue on with that HSC thing I have in like 6 weeks...

I thought I'd write up my results from the trials. Dear god. They're pretty terrible.

Advanced English - 86/105 (82%)
Modern History - 80/100 (80%)
Ancient History - 78/100 (78%)
Extension English - 39/50 (78%)
Industrial Tech Multimedia -34/40 (85%)
Extension History - 37/50 (74%)

(And I also got my Extension History Major Project results - 23/25)

So about three band 5s, three band 4s, which would get me a horrible ATAR of about 70 – which is actually, surprisingly, what I need to get into my uni course. However, I don't like taking chances and I'm pretty sure there is limited places in the course, so getting the best results would be nice.

But, of course, I have to take into account that I wasn't given any time to study, so really these results are the fault of my school and they're actually pretty damn good if you think of the fact I only studied the day before each of them.

So, with more time now, I should be able to perfect my memory and knowledge and exam skills. Well, here's hoping. I can already feel myself slacking off, but I promise I won't. Just need to keep myself going from here on in.

Now, off to Extension History on time, for the first time in about 2 terms.

THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 8 weeks till freedom.

the crazy taxi lady

2011-09-02T20:00:00.009+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Thursday 30th August, 2001
On Thursday we drove to the airport. At the airport we got into the aeroplane. We flew to England! In England we spent most of our English money. Then we went to the British Airways and then we went off to Holland. In Holland we got a taxi to a hotel. The hotel was called the Lancaster.

Friday 31st August, 2001
On Friday we went to a canal boat. On the way we saw heaps of boats, trams, bikes and cars especially the skinny little cars. Kieran and I got to have turns of the video camera.

Saturday 1st September, 2001
On Saturday we went to the Artis Zoo. In the night we heard the lions, birds and the monkeys because we are just across the road from the zoo. At the zoo dad said that some animals would make us home sick! They were wallabies straight from Australia! These were all the animals: lions, birds, giraffes, monkeys, apes, gorillas, beavers, sloths, seals, polar bears, sloth bears, zebras, tigers, snakes, leopards and elephants.

Sunday 2nd September, 2001
On Sunday we went to see Anika. Anika’s garden was nice with the gipsy van.

Holland! I didn't know we went back to Britain for a bit, but I guess we spent the money on Duty Free Airport chocolates or whatnot. But Holland was brilliant and also slightly mad.

There's a reason why I mentioned the taxi ride in my diary... I just didn't go into detail, sadly. But all four of us were in fear of our lives. This lady taxi driver, who spoke little English, was somehow steering the wheel of the car. I'm not sure how this is possible seeing as she was on the phone and eating a banana at the same time.

The moment she started driving not parallel to, not across, but actually ON the full-functional tram lines we freaked out. She seemed to know what she was doing though and, hey, I'm still alive.

This hotel was pretty awesome too. There was a zoo across the road. The windows opened in a wierd angled way that I learnt was actually so when furniture needed to be put into the rooms, it could be done through these huge windows, rather than the inconvenient doorways.

I just wondered how they would furniture through these windows when they were like 5 stories up.

I remember seeing the canals. We went on a boat down one and then – as I wrote – Kieran and I took turns with the video camera... which I remember because we had so much bloody footage of the canals opening and closing and the boats going through.

Then on September 1 (only 10 days away from the big incident in America, note) we went to the zoo which was spelt completely different yet again.

It's weird that I document the amazement of seeing kangaroos at this zoo, because all I remember seeing were meerkats. But yes, it was very cool hearing all the zoo animals at night from our hotel room.

We had Chinese and Italian food while we were there. I'm getting slightly concerned over how much in detail I remember restaurants and what I ate and stuff like that.

And yes Anika! ANIKA! Her daughter Charlotta (the second from the left in the photo) and her ... cousins spent plenty of time with us while Dad and Mum got acquainted with the adults. They had an amazing backyard. Well, it was more a paddock. Hectares of land! And in the middle of this field in the distance, there was a random gypsy van.

Which now that I think about, knowing all the Nazi history, would have been dangerous to own back in World War 2. Surely? Gypsies!

I recall watching Scooby Doo in Dutch over there too. It was still the best show ever, even though I couldn't understand it.

I remember being taken to an antiques shop which I think Charlotta's dad ran. And we played running games in the shop, surrounded by all these old things. I have such a clear image in my head of this grand piano we kept running past.

Ahh, I'm going on and on. I'll stop now. This just excited me.

delete me, delete me

2011-09-02T19:06:00.000+10:00

I do sometimes doubt my aspirations for the future in terms of what I want to do for university and a career. I can just see myself getting into that uni degree on Digital Media and finding it too difficult, or not as interesting as I thought, or discovering my interests radically change.

Who knows, I might end up highly interested in mathematics or science!

Okay, fair enough, that sentence was so out-there that it wasn't even funny. Just plain stupid. I apologise for making ridiculous statements such as that.

However, yes, I have been concerned that maybe I may get bored of it. I love doing multimedia type things, but perhaps it's bad to have too much of a good thing and perhaps I've had too much of this 'good thing' this year.

The animation almost killed me. I am now up to editing a Graduation Video that will eat away at my time this weekend.

Yet perhaps I am just being silly. I mean, I love film making! If I was able to make an 25 minute animation that left me with 98% less sleep than I should have been getting this year, and then still want to go on to create a video for my grade, then that interest still has to be there and it has to be extensive.

I was thinking about this today. I don't even know what I like about making films. There is a lot of painful experiences in doing it. The frustrations of conflicting time schedules, the time it takes, errors with technology, bringing in equipment... and yet, there has to be something I enjoy about it.

It's just getting the content. I'm smiling as Mr or Mrs Teacher speak to the camera, and I know that it's being recorded, and I know that I can use this bit, and that bit, and the random thing that happened that you hadn't expected can be left in. And I think yes! this is definitely enjoyable.

Of course, there's a group of us at work on this project. Namely Jess and I, but there are others who are allowing me to just handle the confusing organisation through draft texts on my mobile, and doing the jobs I don't want to do, such as convincing awkward teachers to hug Danniel.

Today was one of the productive days. Not productive as in school work, as I did... not one bit of study today, but productive as in filming.

Filming's almost done! We've got interviews with tonnes of teachers this time, extra joke parts, something to tie up the 'Do you know who Danniel is?' segment from our Year 10 video, more photos and interviews with students themselves.

It's going to be an upgrade from the Year 10 Graduation Video one. And not just because Jess' camera is sexy High Definition Awesomeness.

Maybe its the editing? I honestly can't wait to get into the video and start hacking at it until we have a completed product that everyone will love. I do love editing.

So, clearly film making is a passion of mine. Have no idea why since it's very tedious, but I suppose everything has its ups and downs. I just love having the footage and being able to play with it and create something that other people wouldn't know how to do – and not only be able to do it, but do it freaking well!

If not, there's always mathematics. That'd make Ms P proud!

Actually, scratch that. Here I am thinking that the maths joke is funny again.

THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 9 weeks till freedom.

did you hear that noise

2011-08-30T19:43:00.000+10:00

Let me recount to you the past few days which have been exciting and complete madness.

Saturday. I caught up with Kenney after his cruise to continue with the scripting on our entry for the Macarthur Playwriting competition. It involved eating yoghurt, loving cupcakes, rosy tea, tears and co-ordinated texting and hair-straightening – only some of which was actually in the script. We spent a decent couple of hours on it, through all the talk, but we had to cut it short.

Because soon we had to drive to Hurlstone to meet up with Angus and the family for the apparently famous Country Fair. We spent some time wandering around, where I randomly saw Neelam from school there, and I hugged Obi far too much because I had missed him. Kenney shared memories of tiramisu-throwing and we all judged him.

He drove Angus and I back to Casey's, where her brother's party was being prepared. It was just so nice to have spent the whole day with some of my favourite people. Eventually, I was reunited with Tamara from primary school, which was nice and emotional, and I met Francesca! After months of being Twitter friends. Haha.

I had to leave before the party had even started, as I had to rush home to go down to the school with Natalie to go see the Great Australian Rock Musical being performed by students. We met up with Jen, James and Val for a night that was unexpectedly enjoyable.

Although there were the more-than-few technical hitches, I enjoyed the musical immensely. Even though a group of assholes in the row in front of us were unable to stop talking or stop fidgeting, leading us to push the row of chairs in, and leave them to have to move. Ha. We won that battle!

The night ended with me listening to music at 2 in the morning and not hearing William and Josh knocking at our windows. I did hear it once, but was concerned that it could have been a serial killer, as most people would if someone was knocking on your window at 2 in the morning.

Sunday. Although they hadn't been let into the house, they returned later that day as William had to learn the bass parts for Techno Fan by the Wombats, for our indie band performance... which I believe I have not mentioned before. Well, I'm in a band. And I'm the singer. There we are then.

Andy, Kieran, William and I practiced the song to perfection while Josh improvised lyrics and decided our band needed a screamo touch to it. Of course all this band practice was in preparation for...

Monday. Sure, there was school to attend. But an hour after I had returned home, we headed out the door to Mt Pritchard. Of course this was a horribly intense afternoon! We met Andy and Will for the audition for Mounties Got Talent, of which we performed in front of all the other auditionees.

Normally, I would be freaking out about the fact that I would be singing in front of all these people. But I didn't have time to. The place said the auditions started at 5.30, so we got there at 5 to enter but there were 4 entrants already in!

This was to set us back, being 5th to audition, as I needed to be meeting Morgan at 6.30 for a train into the city to see Dylan Moran! DYLAN FREAKING MORAN!

But things were looking bleak. They didn't start till 5.45, and by the time we were performing it was 6pm basically, and I needed to be leaving. Being the only band auditioning that night, once we finished mum rushed me to the nearest train station so I could coordinate trains with Morgan.

We will find out if we continue in Mounties Got Talent soon! Here's hoping.

By some miracle, Morgan and I managed to coordinate it so that we got the same train, the train carriage she was in stopped at the exact spot right in front of me, so we were facing each other and didn't need to hunt each other down, and we even go into the city on time!

After purchasing some popcorn, and wondering if the show was actually 18+ and being thankful my stubble was good enough to get me in if it was, we got to see Dylan Moran!!

I don't know how he does it. Comedy just seems to roll off his tongue, from being honest about things most people don't like to say to saying the most remarkably abstract descriptions of things I've ever heard. Loved it so much. So worth it!

And THAT was my last three days.

THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 10 weeks till freedom.

the giant's causeway

2011-08-29T20:00:00.005+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Monday 27th August, 2001
On Monday we drove to the Pier guest house that is near the sea.

Tuesday 28th August, 2001
On Tuesday we drove around Donegal Bay in the hills. Along the way we saw little cliffs, sheeps and cows on the road and other things along the way.

Wednesday 29th August, 2001
On Wednesday we went to the Giant’s Causeway which went to Scotland. The giant’s name was Finn and the Scottish giant’s name was Angus. When we were there we walked on the giant’s causeway. But some of the causeway sank. You should read the story ‘Finn Macool.’ Then we went to the next hotel called ‘Cuan’. When we got unpacking I saw a shop that said ‘Kevin O’G’ that was a newsagents.

Donegal Bay defined Ireland. The cliffs, the sheep, the green, grassy hills around us while the cloudy sky rained gently on us travelling through the twisted roads ... this is all just how I see Ireland.

The Giant's Causeway was pretty damn fine. It is a natural rock formation where all the stones look like steps, which led to a legend about it being a pathway to Scotland and all.

And yes we saw an actual Kevin O'G shop! Dad had to get a photo. I do also recall around this same area there was all this wooded area where we found random tree carvings out of nowhere. Just in the middle of the woods. Amazing.

And was it around here too that there were these wheat fields? I think it was wheat. I just got this image in my head right now. It looks absolutely beautiful in my head. The four of us walked in these fields with the grass or wheat right up to our chests and we just walked along in the silence will we watched the sun set.

Ah, memory is a funny thing.

time out

2011-08-26T20:00:00.002+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Wednesday 22nd August, 2001
On Wednesday we got a horse to a big garden. We had a little run around the garden. Then we got the horse back and got in the car to go to Mary’s house. When we got to Mary’s we had a look around. In the night our cousins (second cousins) came around to visit us.

Thursday 23rd - Sunday 26th August, 2001
Thursday to Sunday: We went to Maree’s house. We played with our second cousins and played soccer, riding bikes. Then we went to Phil’s and played hotels, go-cart, bikes and taxis which we used with the go-cart.

So the meeting of our second cousins at Noni's should have been a sure indicator to K and I that most of our relatives were girls. In fact, I'm pretty sure all our second cousins were. So much for the O'Gorman family name living on. Kieran and I worked out that it was down to us now.

I'll be honest and say I don't recall this horse or big garden. How specific was I as a kid?! I do recall seeing many horse and carriage type services all around Europe's tourist spots, so Mum and Dad must have given in to our begging and finally let K and I go on one.

This is when we met Mary. Oh, Mary was so lovely! I really loved her. And it wasn't just because she gave both K and I ALOT of money because by this point we had run out of our spending money.

In fact, I had been very disappointed with the whole money exchange thing. I had started out with $100 to spend, which for me was alot at the time, and once it was converted I only had 30 pounds. 30 pounds?!

But we got used to the currency but to us, 30 pounds still equaled 30 dollars. So when Mary gave us about 30 pounds each, we didn't see it as anything until Mum pointed out later that she had pretty much given us way, way, way too much. We still thought we deserved it, seeing as we spent this time in Ireland doing chores.

We were doing the whole 'home' thing because we were homesick. We swept and raked Mary's backyard... this is how much we loved her. And it was nice to have a motherly figure look over us while Dad and Mum continued travelling places in Ireland.

Maree's house was good too. This is where we played with all our girl cousins. They had this great toy shed in their backyard. They had a go-cart! And I recall seeing one of those Polly Pocket toy things as well.

It was a nice chill time for the two boys sick of travelling. And we fitted in far too well with the madness that is Ireland.

used to know

2011-08-23T20:05:00.001+10:00

Last weekend couldn't have gotten any more relaxing or enjoyable. Even if I felt the need to do school work, I made sure I did not do anything unnecessary as I deserved a break. Normally this is the I-deserve-a-break-after-writing-a-sentence-in-an-essay kind of break, but this was an actual I-just-finished-my-trials-and-had-both-my-majors-completed-and-marked break. WELL deserved.

My Saturday was spent mostly in bed. I woke up at 11 – yes, 11. I had slept for a good 12 hours! This has not happened for a good couple of months. I woke up actually not feeling exhausted.

Then I slowly made an Oreo Cheesecake, which was pretty much my normal cheesecake recipe only with an Oreo base instead of normal biscuit, and Oreos instead of lemon in it. And the results were very rich, but also very amazingly tasty. Happy with that.

Then eventually I went over to Natalie's for a Games Night with James, Jen, Robert and Val. I don't think I've laughed so much in so long. We played boys versus girls in most games. Although the guys were horrible at Taboo, we pulled through with our singing and drawing. Which is weird.

We also had far too much to eat. Not that I'm complaining. I had just finished a two week period of exams, which came after a period of two weeks of stress, which came after a holiday of stress, which came after a term of an impossible amount of school work.

I got to eat a lot, sleep a lot and not do anything school related. It was so lovely.

Sunday was school related in a way. I joined Jen for some serious traffic controlling out the front of the school. Donning fluro yellow jackets, we made sure no one entered the exit driveway which we did quite well, although we're really hoping the nice lady who's husband is a police officer was able to find her way home.

Natalie joined us later on and we took turns collecting 'payment' for anyone entering the school for whatever kind of dance competition thing was on. And we made $250 to go into the Year 12 funds. Win.

Then, I did my usual hurriedly-finish-two-assignments thing late that night, and returned to school for what feels like a new term. A new term of about 5 weeks. A new term of disappointment?

I'm very sure everyone is going to get on everyone's nerves this term. It's already starting. I'll wait till I have all my results of the trials to tell you, but unfortunately they aren't all that great. They're amazing considering the fact I had no time to study, but not good.

And people will whinge and say, 'oh you can't say yours are bad, look at mine!' But, seriously, mine are not a good mark and with all this time to study now, I should be able to go well. It's just that initial disappointment.

Also, I'm not sure if I can upload stuff about my Multimedia major. I might do it this weekend, and just not write the name of it, so it can't be googled, as the marking process may still be going!

Eh, updates, updates... I'll let you know when something significantly exciting happens soon.

past the dance hall

2011-08-21T20:00:00.009+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Sunday 19th August, 2001
On Sunday we drove through Dublin to New Grange. At New Grange there was burial mounds. We went inside the burial mounds we saw a chamber made of big rocks. The lady turned off the lights and showed us what happens each year at the winter solstice.

Monday 20th August, 2001
On Monday we drove to the Laune and Taylors Hotel.

Tuesday 21st August, 2001
On Tuesday we had an adventure going to Aunty Nonie’s house. We went up to the wrong house and went through water that had flooded. Finally we got the right road but there was piles of gravel. We got out of the car and went up to the house. It was Aunty Nonie’s house. Kieran and I stayed in Aunty Nonie’s house while mum and dad done all these adventurist stuff outside. We had a great time playing with our cousins Rachel, Stacey, Joanne and another girl I’ve forgotten.

New Grange! For all those who did Ancient History with my in Year 11, we did stuff on these structures. Don't remember? Well, this was used to record the Winter Solstice. We went inside the structure and this guide turned off all the lights and used artificial lighting to show us what it would have been like when the sun hit the right spot. It was kind of cool. As a small child, I even found it awesome.

Now, Aunty Noni! Firstly, I apologise for not remembering 'another girl''s name. I've spoken about the Aunty Noni adventure before. I talked about the directions from the pub, where they told us that it was past the dance hall that burnt down 20 years earlier. I talked about the lady who gave us directions who turned out to be a relative of ours. I talked about the difficulty in finding the house. I talked about the flooded bridge and the burnt clutch, the smell of which stuck with us for the rest of our usage of it.

It was quite a strange place, her house. It was all alone up this hill. And it was tiny. I remember the house was so small. Kieran and I went in there alone while Mum and Dad found somewhere to put the car and Aunty Noni served us 7-up, choosing two of the billions of dirty glasses stacked up in her 1metre by 1metre kitchen.

The cousins turned up later to suss us out. I remember we followed them up the pathway past Aunt Noni's house which was all just woodland. I vaguely remember seeing a chicken have its neck broken, ready for someone's dinner?

This is gonna be one of those stories I tell for years. And just ask my cousins, the Skarratts. They have just as funny stories about finding Noni. It's not just us. It's just Ireland. It's a crazymad place!

the big day

2011-08-19T21:17:00.000+10:00

Today was all about the marking.

I got to school at 7.30am to make sure everything was working.
I had to leave to go on my Multimedia excursion and locked up the room awaiting the markers.
At 11am, when I was at the AIT centre thats part of UTS, I was thinking of the markers arriving.
When I failed to create a 3D monkey, I instead thought about the markers.
I didn't stop talking about the markers.
Even sitting in Maccas for the second time that day, I wasn't thinking about the cheeseburger.

I got distracted momentarily when I got to make an iPod app game! Oh, and we did motion capture too. Cameras filmed us in this room and, by picking up our shadows from the different angles, our movements were detected, sent to a computer and the three digitally made characters followed our every move. So freaking cool!

But, my computer kept crashing. And people wonder why I don't like Windows machines. They never work for me ever.

Sir came over to me at one stage to tell me also that the markers had requested to mark Frankie's unfinished project, even though it had been handed in late. Is this a good sign that they thought mine was amazing enough that the other Multimedia project had to be seen?

We got the train back in and my head hurt, I was cold and uncomfortable, I was tired, I probably looked extremely disgusting to the four attractive American girls who for some reason were planning, on their trip in Australia, to visit Campbelltown?

Maybe to visit the native culture? Learn some of their rituals, like shanking?

And then we got back home and I went with sir back to school, as he said that the markers, having an 11am-5pm time schedule, would have left about 3 anyway and I could go in and pack everything up.

This was not the case. We both walked into D Block and I walked past the classroom. All I saw was some people but I didn't dare look any longer or closer – the markers were still there. In fear of my life, seeing as I'm supposed to stay anonymous and whatnot, I just asked sir if I should just leave.

He was seriously considering hiding me in the staffroom until they left in the next 20 minutes. But instead I had to sneak past the doorway quickly, without showing my face. Tricky business.

It probably wouldn't have mattered anyway. But if they had interacted with me, that would have been the bad thing.

And I was questioning why they were still there marking. Could it be because they were still going over the awesomeness of my project?! Here's hoping. Here's really hoping.

ah be seein' ya

2011-08-18T21:37:00.003+10:00

Oh, alright I can see you've all been so impatient to find out how my exam weeks have been. Well, wait no longer! After this, you will finally be able to leave your computer chair after two weeks of immense, intense suspense.

Today has been quite a good day for me on a number of accounts. Not only have I finished my trial exams, I also set up my 'presentation' for my Multimedia Major. It's all sitting in a room in the school, waiting to have a couple of touch-ups done for the morning, then the markers will be in at 11 to have a look at it all.

So. The exams. I'd have to say I didn't go my best, but I'm allowing myself to blame the school on this, as the school is stupid enough to structure the exams around the exact same time I had two majors due, so I had to complete those first and learn all new content for three other subjects and ... really, the only time I had to study was the night before, every time.

English Paper 1
Felt confident about this exam. I had actually studied for this one a little. I wrote a decent essay and a half-decent short story where I had Australia blown up. Cool short story bro.

English Paper 2
Um. Yeah. Not so great. Didn't study enough for this one. Didn't even have enough information on two of the topics to go off. My texts in time essay was lacking in the time part. My history and memory essay was lacking in both departments. At least Shakespeare was alright.

Extension History
Afternoon exam, so had the morning to study also. Easy. Did a Bede box. Wrote about the filthy sexual habits of women convicts. I love history.*

Ancient History
By this point, I was celebrating just remembering basic things about historical events and sources that I could use. I finished it, everything had accurate and relevant information. Just not enough detail!

Extension English
I wrote a NINE PAGE ESSAY. Then, in the last half an hour, I started writing my short story with: a) not a clue on how the story was going to end up; b) nearly forgetting to add in the quote and then doing it really badly. Still, NINE PAGE ESSAY.

Modern History
See: Ancient History. Although, according to sir, I did well in my Core Topic.

Multimedia
Didn't study. Didn't need to. Got in there, slowly – oh so slowly – went through the exam within the hour and a half, and finished with 15 minutes to check everything. Was a nice exam to end on.

Then this afternoon, spent hours setting up my presentation. It looks as good as it can in a computer room. Hopefully the markers will enjoy it!!

So, that's the horrid school information out of the way. Hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I have been enjoying this year of school! HOORAH!

Someone take me away from this mental institution cunningly disguised as an education system before I resort to self harm.**

*Dear lord, I sound so seedy!
** I don't actually want to self-harm. It'd make an awful mess!

the merry ferry

2011-08-18T20:00:00.003+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Friday 17th August, 2001
On Friday we went by a big ferry to Ireland! On the ferry there was shops, a kids cinema, heaps of places to eat and TV. When we had a loveley time playing our gameboys this pirate came over to us. He made funny jokes and we laughed. When we got off the ferries we were in Ireland!

Saturday 18th August, 2001
On Saturday we went to Avoca (Ballykissangle) and we took photos of the Fitzgerald Pub.

Okay. Can we all just pause for a moment to look at this photo. Seriously. The amount of cuteness and hilarity mixed together here! And imagine K looking like this and doing the accent at the same time. I couldn't even... I don't .... oh dear lordy lordy.

And, apologies once more. I'm not very good in the memory department for anything interesting or significant. I can tell you that the hotel in which that photo of K was taken had a wedding party staying there. But nothing else important unless I have photos as my guide.

The cruise ship over to Ireland was strange. Sure, lots of people enjoy going on holidays where they go on boats, but I don't find any fun in being on the sea in some kind of closed in space with cinema rooms and costumed peoples. However, it was nice to have these luxuries available for a short period of time.

But the Fitzgerald Pub was grand. There was this show called Ballykissangel that the parents used to watch and so they found great joy in being able to go to one of the major landmarks in the show... the pub. I remember that Dad ordered a guinness but could barely drink any, so Mum ended up drinking it all. Go Mum!

There was a gift shop too, where we bought a tiny, tiny little tiny bottle that apparently has Guinness in it. It's all sealed and is supposed to be like a keyring type thing, but who knows what liquid it possesses? We've never opened it, but we still have it.

If we opened it now, we'd be like 'Yum, smell that! It's a 2001 Guinness. Good year.'

Ah, Ireland. I loved Ireland.

just rocks

2011-08-16T20:00:00.002+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Wednesday 15th August, 2001
On Wednesday we went to a Dr. Who exhibition. We went through the time machine and as we walked we saw the Daleks and the other ugly beasts.

Thursday 16th August, 2001
On Thursday we drove through the mountains and up at a rocky beach. At the beach we made a sand castle (rock-castle) with a rock wall around it and a pathway to a stone circle.

Yes, a Doctor Who exhibition. My little self was bursting with excitement inside, even though I didn't know what half the stuff was. The Dalek was amazing though. You'd step inside, speak and sound like a Dalek.

And there! There is my prime example of the beaches in the UK! Full of rocks! Not sand, just rubble! But we did take advantage of the rocks making our own version of Stone Henge.

marking suggestions

2011-08-14T22:40:00.001+10:00

You know there is something seriously wrong with a subject you do at school when you stay up to 3 in the morning to finish the A3, 40-paged portfolio for your Multimedia major, all the while communicating with your teacher who is also still awake at that time.

I had to create a time plan for this project, which is a series of timelines that state what I did during the terms at school – as apparently no major project work is to be done at home, ahem. And if I had done all the animation and the game creation and the video editing and the promotion and the packaging and everything else in the time allocated at school, it would never have happened.

It came to a point where I was questioning the extent of this project. It seemed so much, but sir didn't seem to think it was. He kept pushing and pushing for more content to be created, more animation to be done.

And I'm still here thinking, is this just him trying to make it appear as if all this work is needed, so he can finally say at the end of it all "So, you didn't actually have to do all of that work. I just made you do it so your project would be amazing. You're going to get more than 100% for this now"?

Or is this kind of work actually expected from students who do Multimedia majors?

There were so many times I wanted to give up, because I believed the project was not physically possible to achieve. I still think it took a miracle for me to finish. Right now, I may as well be celebrating not dying from sleep deprivation.

But instead I am celebrating the relief of FINISHING MY MULTIMEDIA MAJOR PROJECT. YES. Let it be known that at 2.28am on the 14th of August, my major project was completed!

It's done! And I am so very, very relieved and happy and I feel like Frodo at the end of the Lord of the Rings trilogy when the ring is thrown into the fires of Mount Doom and he feels a terrible burden be lifted from his shoulders.

Only I didn't collapse halfway there, to have Sam carry me instead AND THEN have a scrawny monster thing bite my finger off. It was more a half-analogy. Just stick with it.

My reaction to finishing wasn't how I expected. What I had expected was to scream and dance around the house and text people feverishly. Instead, I finished at 2.30 in the morning and was too tired to do anything but collapse into bed once the completed portfolio had uploaded.

I woke up today feeling... calm? Was that the word? Everything was really calming. It was a nice temperature, the sun was out, I took the dog for a long walk at one stage and I stood in the middle of this park and I couldn't hear anything. It was just so quiet and peaceful.

Yep. Burden lifted.

So, is it expected or did I unknowingly over-achieve? I suppose I'll find out when its all marked. Which is happening this Friday coming! Then I'm sure I can post up all the stuff from my major project on the weekend? Or do I still have to be the anonymous 'Student Number' for a longer while yet?

THE END-OF-HSC COUNTDOWN-O-METER: 12 weeks till freedom.

through the wardrobe

2011-08-14T13:33:00.002+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Sunday 12th August, 2001
On Sunday we drove to a hotel called The Lodge that was in Wales. We could tell that we were in Wales because the signs were in Welsh and then English. When we got to The Lodge, we thought that we only had a small room but we had a little cottage with our own kitchen!

Monday 13th August, 2001
On Monday we had a quiet time at the hotel and we had a great time playing with the toys that we got on our bed.

Tuesday 14th August, 2001
On Tuesday we went to the Zoo (Sw). At the zoo we saw heaps of birds, sealions, squirrels and penguins. The penguins were cute! Every time I stood up against the glass the penguins would come and look at ME! Then we drove to Bodnant Gardens.

Kieran and I absolutely loved the cottage. After the series of hotel rooms, a house was well welcomed. It had been a mistake though. They had put us in the wrong place and we had been told to move into our hotel room later.

Mum, out of sympathy for us, decided to pay the extra just so we could all have our own bedrooms, a fireplace and even teddy bears! THE COTTAGE HAD TEDDY BEARS. We watched The Weakest Link on TV that night.

The cottage also had a lamppost outback. Having been read the Narnia series by Dad throughout this holiday, this was quite amusing.

Welsh is such a funny language. So long and full of consonants. So yes the Zoo was actually the Sw. Always love a good sw.

halfway there

2011-08-11T20:30:00.004+10:00

Oh hi there! I just thought I'd take a moment out of my busy schedule to blog something. I'm not going to talk about my exams yet, let's leave that for a post at the end of it all where I can tell you all about them, yeah?

But this feeling just hit me. Overwhelmed me a little. Here I am procrastinating over studying for Ancient by doing Multimedia work (yes, yes, I know, its gotten to the point where I physically have no time that I'm actually doing work as procrastination) and I was just thinking about how everything is ending.

Like, yeah, yeah, I'm always being all over-dramatic and saying...
'It's my final years of school!'
'It's my final year of school!'
'It's my last two terms of school!'
'It's my last term of school!'
But now it's more like 'It's my final weeks of school!'

Things already feel like they are coming to a close.

I'm halfway through my trial examinations.
I've already submitted my Extension History major.
My Multimedia major is due on Monday.
The HSC exams are in two months.
I graduate at the end of next month.
I'll be finished school within three months.

But things are also feeling like they are just beginning.

I have my UAC code so I can apply for uni's right now. When I get time.
I'm yet to finish my applications for early entry and scholarships for UOW.
The video camera I want is now available in Australia.
I'll be 18 within three months.

I went through personal struggles because of the context of my time at school this year.
But now I feel like I don't belong to this year, but I belong to the future.
This year will just become history and memory.
... And I've got nothing clever to say that incorporates Shakespeare here. Sorry.*

"Good Sean cast thy nighted colour off"?
What nighted colour?! I'm quite excited for the ending of this year!

Aaaaaand back to the Ancient History study.

*Actually, I'm just sorry for mentioning anything to do with Advanced English at all.

mad as rabbits

2011-08-11T20:00:00.003+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Thursday 9th August, 2001
On Thursday we drove south to a little lake and we went along this path. As we walked along the path we saw ducklings. They were very cute!!! Then we drove to the next hotel. It was called Eastbourne.

Friday 10th August, 2001
On Friday we went across with a car ferry and we had a walk along the lake. When we were walking we saw a deer.

Saturday 11th August, 2001
On Saturday we went by car ferry to the other side and we drove up to Hilltop. This was where Beatrix Potter used to live. We went into her house and we even saw some of Beatrix Potter’s books still in her house.

Ah! Eastbourne! All I remember about this hotel was the embarrassment upon leaving it. You see, I thought it was a good idea to draw something in my notebook on my bed. Turns out, textas stain.

We had all our clothes washed at this hotel. Mum was delighted when we weren't charged for it. She wasn't delighted, however, when she had to go into town and buy the hotel new bed sheets in a strange place she'd never been.

I was in the bad books for a few days.

Beatrix Potter's house was amazing. And car ferries are always fun. I found it strange that you just drove onto a ship and would remain in the car but would still be moving. Upon arriving at the cottage, everything had to be protected! We wore plastic on our shoes... maybe on our hands. We weren't allowed to touch anything or breathe.

However it was such a wonderful cottage. So cute! Although the toilet was apparently destroyed, with yellow tape crossing it off. Wonder what happened in there?! BEATRIX?!?

looking for nessie

2011-08-08T20:00:00.003+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Like a boss!

Monday 6th August, 2001
On Monday we went into Inverness and we went to a Cáleih (concert of Scottish music) at this place where you could see the seals in the evening. When the concert was finished Kieran and me bought a baby seal. When we went back to the hotel we saw a Grey Seal and we took a photo of the seal.

Tuesday 7th August, 2001
On Tuesday we drove past Loch-ness but we didn’t see the monster! Then we got to the hotel near the night.

Wednesday 8th August, 2001
On Wednesday we walked around the Roman Fort. When we got to a soccer field we started playing soccer. After that we went back to the hotel.

When I write I bought a baby seal, I mean a toy baby seal. As if I'd buy a real one. Too much feeding required. But yes, while Mum and Dad enjoyed listening to Scottish music, K and I escaped to outside where we played in this field overlooking a huge lake as the sun slowly went down.

On the way home, we had to pull over to the side of the road as we saw an actual real seal (not a toy one) on a rock! Excitement plus! Of course, then Dad stepped in dog shit and we had to deal with that in the trip back to the Hotel.

The hotels following the suite weren't as grand. I remember a cheap motel like room we stayed at, watching TV where all we could get was a cartoon on Nessie, the Loch Ness monster! Surely it was a tourist channel, or maybe they're just obsessed over there.

Nevertheless, we totally got a photo of bubbles in the Loch. Possible Nessie sighting? I'd like to think so. My younger self thinks otherwise.

Also, that picture of Kieran and I looking all pro – I'm not sure exactly where it was taken. However, it was on one of our many forest walks we did where I recall climbing over many stone fences with these small foot holder things. And of course Mad Cow Disease was around at the time, so we had to be careful! I believe at one stage we had to get our shoes sterilised.

thinking too much

2011-08-07T00:19:00.004+10:00

You're stressing once again. Last term was bad enough, you think. Having to do all the work on your majors and then being bombarded with five assignments in the one go ought to knock any normal human out flat.

But no. Somehow you managed to keep going.
Despite the lack of sleep.
Despite the continuous stress.
Despite the ongoing concern that it isn't good enough, there isn't enough time to do it.
You struggle onwards.

And now. Again. You thought all the difficult work was over. But instead you are facing what could potentially be the worst week of your life – and you thought you'd already had your worse.

It is a Friday night. You realise that one of you major works are due the next Friday.
First thoughts? Unpreparednotenoughtimestresspanicohmygodstresspanic.

Friday night was going to be a productive evening. Instead, due to panic, you give up and spend the night relaxing because you've convinced yourself you deserve it.

Saturday and Sunday become a blur, where you're constantly but slowly going through all your work. You're getting tired, you're starting to procrastinate. You spend an afternoon jamming with your new band which – by this point – you don't care about the work because there is just too much.

Monday comes. You stay home, thinking one more day and your majors will be completed.
One more day. One more day.
But, of course, nothing is that quick to finish.

Tuesday. You go to school but leave halfway to spend hours at TAFE.

Wednesday. You stay home out of panic. You have to finish two majors and homework for Ancient and Modern, but instead take up the time doing Extension English homework that's due in an hour. You go to school for class and the stress of exams gets worse.

Thursday. You have an excursion – yet again not at school. You are going to Paramatta on a history tour, with the teacher that you owe a Extension History major work to the very next day ... and you think of how little you have done of it.

You go home that evening and rush and rush on it. However, even fixing up small things like bibliographies takes a long time. Getting distracted by multimedia work, you end up staying up till 3 in the morning to try and finish it.

You don't. Of course. Did you expect anything different?

So you wake up at 7 the next day and rush to get it completed. Luckily, you have a double free period that morning. Still not enough time. You finally finish the major, but with only an hour left till you have to be at school – at which you have an English exam to do.

Of which you have not yet studied for.
Of which you have not yet even got content for.
Of which you now have to quickly rush to find quotes and techniques from the book.

You get to school, Amie has one of our famous school-parties with balloons this time!, and then you go into the exam. You're so tired, you have a study hang-over (and it wasn't even study) so you don't care about the fact that you're failing this exam as you write a feature article the quality of horse shit.

And just when you think it's all over and there's been enough stress for one year ... you have your trials the very next week. No study done for them yet. Why?

Because you haven't had time to brush your teeth let alone think about studying.

You go home with the plans of getting school work done, but end up sleeping. You go out with Natalie, Jen, James, Robert, Val to Pancakes and spend the rest of the Saturday doing absolutely nothing.

And now, you sit here blogging, flickering between emotions.
You flick from
panic to relaxing
adrenaline to rest.

You feel like you should be doing all this hard, hard study for the week ahead, but at the same time you look back at your year – all those months where the 'school-work : time-to-do-it' ratio is very in favour of you getting no sleep – and think that if you can't get it all done, then sod it! You need rest!

Everything is going terribly wrong. You're unprepared, you have only a day to get all your English notes prepared for Monday and Tuesday, and have all the Ancient and Modern history content done and Multimedia major completed.

And in the end? Yes, you'll look back and laugh at how silly you were. You'll look back and read this and think 'This year wasn't that bad, was it? I was such a loser. The exam thing was easy, I wish I'd known this before I went into them.'

But you know the truth is,
that even if you could go back in time and tell yourself that it'll be okay,
everything will be fine,
you'll go well in your exams,
they're not that big a deal anyway.

You know that you wouldn't listen.

bombing with no bombs

2011-08-05T13:32:00.007+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Thursday 2nd August, 2001
On Thursday we went to the Wool Mill. I had fun! We got shown how they make tartans and there was an exhibition.

Friday 3rd August, 2001
On Friday we went to the Royal Scottish Museum and went into the part that was called “Awesome Insects”. We could dress up like scientists and we got a stencil, mask and a magnifying glass. Then we went to the movie “Cats and Dogs”.

Can I just point out.... Kieran's face.

Saturday 4th August, 2001
On Saturday we drove up to the hotel. We had a break at Stirling Castle. There was bombing going but they had no bombs. It was great! Then we drove to the hotel.

Sunday 5th August, 2001
On Sunday we drove to Rogie Falls and we walked down to the burro (water). We walked across the suspension bridge. That’s where mum saw two Salmon fish. We saw deer in the scary forest that was like Red Riding Hood’s forest.

The Wool Mill! I remember the Wool Mill. It wasn't awfully interesting and I'm not sure why we would have actually chosen to have gone there, but I remember it as a huge factory building with just mountains of materials for tartans surrounding us.

It was like a Tartan Kingdom and I remember Kieran and I enjoying running around and getting lost in all its kiltness. There was also a machine there that made coins. You put in your own loose change and it would smooth it, stretch it into a long shape and print onto it a new pattern.

Only thing was, it didn't work too well and the printing wasn't very deep. Think we put the coin in the wrong way.

The Science Museum / Cats and Dogs thing must have been K and I's day off where we got to do something normal, rather than look at castles which would have been boring us by this stage.

Saying that, we went to Stirling Castle. But only because it was suggested to us by Mr Cameron, who was a Scottish teacher at my primary school. He was the definition of crazy. He'd do casual teaching and was just so damn funny and brilliant.

Being the child of a teacher, I was always around teachers all day and I got to know him quite well, so he told us of the exciting places we could go in Scotland. So we did. I went to send him a postcard, but never finished it.

Rogie Falls was enjoyable. We just walked across a suspension bridge into a dark forest perfect for filming some kind of horror film. Lovely. Lovely Scotland.

getting lost with us

2011-08-04T19:12:00.001+10:00

I knew today wasn't going to be a normal day, seeing as Amie and I were going with 'Wise Ellis' or 'Ellis the Elder' on an excursion for Extension History... taking yet another day off school.

The drive into Parramatta was fine, driving down to the docks, where we just happened to find our tour guide, Judith – the loveliest, most enthusiastic lady I have ever met! She loves her Convict History.

We got to look at the docks where convict women would have arrived in Australia for the first time. Across from a McDonalds, was a park where the old factories used to be, the materials used to make the buildings of which were now used in the construction of the church one block down.

Judith even had brothel tokens! Brothel tokens! They were just an example, and actually American ones, but virtually if you paid $3, you could get a token for food, drink or a lady for the whole night. What a deal!

Next stop on the trip was to a Mental Asylum. Not even joking. We were taken to a fully functioning Mental Health Institute to check out the old buildings, as they used to be female factories.

As we walked in to the place, Judith pointed out the male and female jails on opposite sides of the Mental Institute. We also walked past a block of flats where recently released criminals live and a drug rehabilitation building.

And it was fine and safe enough. Even after we walked past the 'You are now entering a Hospital Watch Area', or were eyed by patients metres away. It was wierd to think that I was so close to all these different dangers – kind of thrilling – although there was actually no real danger.

It was more fascinating to think they used to be female factories, where the convict women were taken from the docks into these jails to so strenuous work as supposed 'criminals'.

Now Amie had been concerned about the centre for rapists and paedophiles, the drugs and alcohol abuse clinic, the apartments for the criminals and the Violence Against Women part of the institute, but I had been fine.

It was only when we were walking past a building in a secluded section of the institute where the frightening words 'KILL' were written next to a creepy smiley face, that I started getting concerned.

And then Judith told us that just across from there, behind all these huge steel fences, was the actual dangerously, criminally insane people. Don't get too close now!

But then we left, after saying hello to a patient who was not dangerous but did have a security guard with her, and went to McDonald's for lunch. Afterwards, we visited the University of Western Sydney to see the old and very large building that used to be a children's orphanage.

We ended the day getting lost due to Mrs Ellis' poor driving and enjoying the amazing weather we've had. This weather is so good, it's like Spring's come early.

And that! is how you have an awesome excursion.

eyes closed

2011-08-02T22:49:00.002+10:00

I don't understand the human race. People are so horrible.

So, I do design work for clients. I heard that one of my clients thought I was a lovely boy. Now I thought that was nice, but what struck me was that I only met her the day before and I spent 20 minutes nodding and saying 'yes' a lot as she told me what she wanted done for the brochure or whatever it was.

That's all I did. I smiled a lot maybe. But somehow I had come across as lovely immediately. Which is great, I'm not knocking that. It just made me think.

Same thing with the school principal. My extension history teacher told me the nicest thing the other day: that the principal had actually said to her that I am one of the only things keeping him sane in the school, because he had been assisting me with my extension history project, so was going through all my books and notating and discussing the debate over the bombing of Hiroshima with me.

And you know, that was just me getting school work done! I just nodded a lot, listened, agreed when he paused for breath. But apparently I'm something nice that breaks up the awfulness of his job, having to deal with bad students all day.

So it made me think how easy it seems to be to come across as nice. Especially with the design client. I told Mum how I thought it odd that she already thought I was nice, and Mum just told me that there aren't actually that many people out there who would sit and listen and nod and smile to people anymore, so just by me doing that, I was already a great person.

I just thought that was normal behaviour though. They're called manners! But she's right. Just looking around the school, at all the lower grades. There are no manners or respect there... I haven't seen much at all. I genuinely believe that the year 11s of this year are the last set of kids to grow up with some kind of decent manners and common sense.

The principal has to put up with all these idiots all the time. No wonder why he's been enjoying having discussions with me over history, when I hadn't pinpointed our conversations as anything that interesting and amusing.

Because lots of people are just not nice people. I'm fortunate to be friends with all the nice ones. Of course, I'm not just saying we're nice and perfect – we all screw up sometimes. But generally, we are respectful, lovely people.

But other people are just horrible! What is wrong with the world? I'm setting the scene here. 4.30pm. TAFE. Lunch bench. Outside. Three scary looking guys at another table.

It's a bit of a weird way to explain this story, but basically there was this weird smell hanging around, someone joked that it might have been from the food container that someone had finished with, so Nathan knocked it off the table as a joke.

Apparently knocking something off a table a whole three metres away from an angry skinny dude with tattoos all over is a bad thing to do. It was so stupid. Clearly Nathan wasn't aiming to throw rubbish at the guy. Clearly it didn't go anywhere near him or hit him at all.

If it was going to hit anyone, it was going to hit the angry guy's friend – who told the angry guy that it was 'alright, it was nothing' when the angry guy started yelling all five swear words he knew at Nathan.

Nathan apologised, telling him he wasn't trying to throw rubbish at him, but he wouldn't stop yelling. So Corinne told him to calm down, to which he started yelling three new swear words – especially saved for occasions when he wants to abuse women – and Corinne just walked away.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY HE WAS SO VIOLENT. It was so, so, so, so pointless. Just people! People are so annoying! And irrational. And stupid. And ignorant. And horrible.

I could go on about other examples of stupid humans, but there are too many.
I'll write up a book instead about them all.

When all you have to do is smile and nod to be appreciated as a nice person, and there are other people out there who are busy yelling abuse at girls ten years younger than them in an educational institution, you know there is something with the world.

a sweet suite

2011-08-01T20:00:00.014+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Spot us.

Tuesday 31st July, 2001
On Tuesday we went by car to Whitby and we saw the lighthouse. We had morning tea at a café and we bought some bread at a bakery shop. We had lunch at a park with a dog!!!

Wednesday 1st August, 2001
On Wednesday we went to Scotland. We saw a sign that said “Scotland Welcomes You.” Then we followed the map as we drove to the hotel. The hotel was big with the beach next to it.

Whitby was awesome. I saw it on TV the other day. They have this great big whale bone that they stick up as an arch. The major cafe they have on the corner of the street right near the whale bone is where we ate.

It's so weird sitting here and just remembering the exact layout of the cafe and the atmosphere and everything. It'd be lost on you if I explained what it looked like, and not very interesting. So I won't.

Now Scotland! I liked Scotland. Scotland was cool. The drive there was long and full of green land.

So they made a mistake and gave us the wedding suite. Or I think they didn't have any other room available, so they gave us the biggest, poshest room in their castle-like hotel. And there was this great beach just outside our window – one with actual sand I believe. The rest of the beaches we saw were made of rocks most of the time.

Scotland was, say, very luxurious for us at the time.

grand street piano

2011-07-30T20:00:00.002+10:00

European Holiday 2001: Ten years ago on this day...

Monday 30th July, 2001
On Monday we caught the bus into York. We went to the Viking Centre and as we walked down the stairs we saw layers of the modern city, the medieval town, the Viking town and the Roman town. In the Viking Centre, there was a time machine that took us back in time.

Then we went through this cave that ended at these cable cars. There were these buttons that you had to press and we got a special button for kids. You had to press the button so you could know all about the place when we were moving. At the end of this ride we stand in this line. When we were at the end of the line we could pay £1.00 for making a Viking coin that you could keep. We looked at a display and it changed from Viking time to Modern time. I bought a little Viking ship.

York! No, not the new kind of York in America, but good old York in England. There was lots of street music a-happening on this day. I remember being so obsessed by this band playing that I wanted to buy an album – instead we filmed them.

I even remember how the song went. Dooo-dooo-do-do, doooo-dooo-do-do-do-do-do!

Yeah.

And there was guy playing his grand piano on the street. All in good fun.

Despite what I've written here in my diary about the Viking Centre, all I can remember is freaking out about the plastic automated people that slightly moved and had a creepy stare as you went through on the cable car with their fake voices over the speakers. They were so creepy. This has scarred my childhood.

The Viking coin was very cool. I still have it in my box. I love my Viking coin.